Arsenal have found a new gear - reverse!

There’s been much wailing and gnashing of teeth from Gunners fans this week.

I hear that some have even rent their garments!

It looks like the red machine has stopped, whilst the blue one races away.

You gotta say; Chelsea don’t look like blowing it.

It’s hard to see how they would have lost to Bolton’s stone-age gameplan

Are Arsenal the victims of natural selection?

Have they evolved to such a level, and do they occupy such a specialised niche, that they can’t compete in the real world anymore?

Are Arsenal the new dinosaurs?

Chelsea’s money and the defeat at Old Trafford where the twin meteorites that rocked Arsenal’s world.

BEFORE IMPACT, THE GUNNERS WERE THE UNDISPUTED MASTERS.

But since then, they’ve had to put up with small rodents stealing their eggs. Metaphorically and in real life.

I heard that Steve Bruce was caught breaking into the Colney training ground to steal half a dozen eggs from the fridge.

Pat Rice caught him at it and administered some swift justice.

You probably saw Brucey’s bruises on the back pages.

I keep hearing rumours of paranormal activity around Highbury

Strange signs and symbols are reported to have appeared on the pitch overnight

Word is that a mysterious deity from beyond the seas will soon make himself known to the world.