As Carlos Tevez nodded in another goal for Manchester United last night he ran to the East Stand flapping his shirt like a banner to Fergie.

If he had've called into a cheap t-shirt print shop in Manchester earlier that day he would've had a shirt made up emblazoned with the slogan 'Sign me up Gaffer!'                                                                                                                          Echoing this sentiment were roughly 60,000 United fans singing 'Fergie, Fergie sign him up.'

What more does SAF need? Is it the protracted £30 million? Are there strange dark forces at work in the slimy world of leching agents? Are his stunning looks distracting the other players? These days getting players to show a bit of loyalty to clubs is very rare. We never usually have this problem at United and certainly not with Carlos Tevez.                                                                                                                                                                                                   TV pictures showed him warming up during the Chelsea match patting his badge at the fans. He was even fined two weeks wages at Corinthians for wearing a Manchester United shirt in public BEFORE he came anywhere near the PL.                                                                                                                                                                                              Now this worries me. A lot. How can a player like Tevez who has scored so many important goals, set up countless others (including the winner at the Reebok where tradition states we generally lose) and showed an unwaivering desire to remain in the European Capital of Trophies not be given a contract?                                                                                                                                          

If players like Darren 'cow's arse with a banjo' Bent can be sold for £16 million, Craig Bell-end for £12 million and £20 million Robbie 'ten shots before I get one even near the net' Keane what is £30 million for an actual world-class player like Carlos 'headless chicken' Tevez?

Sign him up now Fergie, there's a long queue forming.