Hi and hello Football fans, it's your old pal Roko the Football Guy, whats going down? I hope all is well wherever you are! Quite appropriately the sky's above Football Guy towers are Grey, it's as if even the weather knows the football season is over (well not quite, still have today's Championship play-off final, Champions League final and a FA Cup final to go).

I decided to take in the last day of the Premier League season from the comforts of the broom closet as I had been out on the sauce the previous two nights and was not feeling all that good. I managed to find a link on the net to some German channel which would cut from game to game as a goal went in, so for example - It started off showing the Hull v Man Utd match for the first five minutes then it cut to Villa Park, then in the 8th minute when Caicedo scored for Manchester City it cut to the City v Bolton match. It's a pretty cool channel to watch an afternoon like yesterday's if you are a neutral as you don't miss any of the action. I would mention the name of the channel and the website link but I know Oleole.com frowns upon such things and would prefer not to rub them the wrong way, but if you already know which sites to look at for such stuff then just find the German channel....... There is only one that I know off!

Boro and Newcastle down

Well, I thought Hull would give Newcastle at least a chance at survival (I know I predicted a draw for Hull, wished I could have had that back straight away).

But nevertheless the Geordie's could not capitalize and I'm not surprised as they barely managed to create a single chance in 90 minutes. Their midfield is completely abject of any form of creativity and I would argue that is the worst in the Premier League.

Where did it all go wrong?

Well this morning I've read quite a few articles where people are saying they should never have fired Fat Sam as he would have got them out of it............. Well it was him who started them on the road to this so that dose not make any sense to me. Where it really when wrong was the day Mike Ashley took over. Since then Newcastle has become an even bigger soap opera than it was before, check this for a surreal list -

Ashley watching away games in the crowd

Whilst wearing wearing a Smith-17 shirt, why Alan Smith?

Fire's Fat Sam and brings back Kevin Keegan

OK, this was a sound move. It also meant a chance of shirt ofr Ashley from Smith-17 to King Kev 1.

Hires Dennis Wise in a executive role

Why? Why would you do that?

Keegan Quits

That's what happens when Dennis Wise is involved with you team in an "executive" role

Ashley tires to sell the team

In an attempted to get his money back Ashley puts the team up for sale, but nobody will pay what he's asking for....... In hindsight he probably should have sold then for what ever the price.

Newcastle relegated

You've got to say, that even for a team that I've branded a joke before, they really have managed to reach new levels of craziness. I'm really going to miss this train-wreck team.......

I think on the whole you really can't argue with the three that went down, I don't feel the football they played for most of the season was good enough to be in the Premier League. I'd also include Hull in that, forget there good start to the season, in the last five months I think they have picked up five points and that's just not good enough (well I guess it was good enough since they survived, but you see my point). Hull remind me of Bradford City when they were in the Premiership - Everyone thought they would go down but against all odds they survived and even beat Arsenal in the league on the way (although Hull did it away) Their kits a quite similar too, but all the joy from the first season was soon sucked away when reality hit in year two and they went down - That's Hull's destiny, just wait and see.

Fulham in Europe

I must say I was rather surprised that Fulham lost to Everton, but hey it was still enough as Spurs as expected got turned over by Liverpool.

I do hope that Europe does not prove to big a distraction for Fulham who next season should still be aiming at staying in the Premiership, we've all seen too many teams fall back hard to earth after impressive seasons.

Bank Holiday fun

Now I know for most of you out there you've got the day off, well the Football Guy does not have the same luxury as he is off the Barcelona on Thursday for his best buddies wedding and therefore needs the hours at work...... Why am I telling you this? Cos just like last week, the Monday hangover will be in two parts as I don't have the time to complete it this morning

Take care

Football Guy

Hi and hello football fans, it's your old pal Roko the Football Guy, whats going down? I hope all is well wherever you are! Things are chilly here in the broom closet at Football Guy Towers despite the fact the sun seems to be shining outside, oh well.......... I'm sure the sun must be shining up in Newcastle after last night vital three points over rivals Boro!

Newcastle 3 v 1 Middlesbrough

If like me, you missed the first half of last nights game you can check out the highlights here.

So yeah, I got home from work a little before 9pm and straight away fired up Portuguese Eurosport and enjoyed the show and what a good show I found it to be!

After the seeing the highlights of the first half I'd say Boro were a tad unlucky not to be leading at the break, unfortunately for them, dread locked striker Emmes finishing let him down (no surprise there for a Boro striker) after creating the chance for himself.

Now here for me is where the turning point came. Picture the scene, your in either dressing room, it's halftime, you need the three points and have 45 minutes to make sure of that, you need some inspiration, what manager looks more likely to inspire you?

On one hand you have Alan Shearer, living legend in the city you play for who is not only the manager of any football team but his boyhood team, the one he love probably more than he loves his wife and kids................. Or you have Gareth Southgate, who I'm sure is a nice guy but looks as though the local kids in the neighborhood where he lives would pelt him with eggs when he goes down the shops and put dog poo through his letter box............... I know which one I'd choose.

As soon as the second half started Newcastle began to push Boro back and the key goal looked like it was on its way, but wait, still one more problem..... Newcastle had a imobile overweight front man who's way passed his best messing things up....... No..... Not Mark Viduka, but Michael Owen! Less than a minute after bringing on Martins for Owen Newcastle got the goal they needed after Viduka somehow won a header he had no right to win and I can only guess the Boro defenders were so amazed by the fact Viduka won the header that they seemed to stand still and watch Martins beat one man as slip finishing in to the bottom corner......... Game set and match, well after they scored a 3rd it was!

I feel that Boro have now been mortally wounded and wont recover, as for Newcastle, they move out of the bottom three for the first time in seven weeks and have their destiny in their own hands. One more win might be enough as I don't see Hull picking up four points from their last two fixtures or over turning the goal difference deficit they have against Newcastle.

Just wait when West Brom pick up six points and gate crash the party!

Take care

Football Guy

Hi and hello Football fans, it's your old pal Roko the Football Guy, whats going down? I hope all's well wherever you are! Things are not good here in the broom closet at Football Guy towers, the reason? I have something growing on the middle of my top lip and I don't know where it came from!!!

It's a good thing I have my Champions League beard covering most of it but it's annoying as hell and I can feel it throbbing...... I'm going to blame a friend who will remain unnamed, I remember the other week drinking from his cup of Coca-Cola by accident, I know he's had this before (he's also been on the podcast) and so remains my number one culprit......

It might also have something to do with me drinking in this "Old Man" pub last week quite a bit (does not look the cleanest pub in the world) I have ruled out this bird from Saturday night as I was already feeling a little tingle before my encounter with her but wherever I got this shit from...... Thanks for Fucking nothing!

Red Cards

So from the Red Cards dished out this weekend, Wayne Rooney's was upheld and he will face a one match band.

Elsewhere Brad Friedel's was, as many people expected, overturned as was George McCartney's for his foul on Shaun Wright Philips.

Yet to my horror there has been no mention of Steven Taylor's assult on Andrey Arshavin?!?!?!?

If I was a player the next match Mark Halsey Ref'ed that I was involved in, I would do the exact same thing as Taylor did to Arshavin on a player of the opposition who was pissing me off and if I got sent off I would take the FA to court and use the Taylor incident as the basis of my case - "he saw it then and thought it was just a foul".

Chelsea

So the Blues forward Nicolas Anelka faces a three week spell on the sidelines with a broken toe, bad news for Chelsea as it leaves them with only Didier Drogba upfront as thier only real striker, well unless you count Kalou or that young Italian (I think he is Italian) striker they have who's name I can't remember.

Also Guus Hiddink has hinted once again he will be off in the summer, I think this depends a lot on how the men from the King's Road fare in the two cups they are in....... And with how much money his good friend Roman wants to throw at him.

Put it this way, as an Arsenal fan, I think Hiddink is a good manager and would love for him to leave Chelsea........ Bring in Graeme Souness, I hear he needs a job and will save you a ton of cash in these worrying times of economic instability!

Lies of the Tiger

I saw this this morning and thought everyone I know or who reads this blog should know about it too.

It's a Youtube post from everyone's favorite Arsenal blogger, Arseblog. He's created a great parody song to the tune of "Eye of the Tiger" called "Lies of the Tigers"....Bet you can guess what it's about!

Basically it's funny as hell and if you can't view it at work, as soon as you leave, go home and watch it or go to a friends house or an internet cafe or whatever...... Just WATCH IT!!!!

Readers comments

Amer - I think the rule said, if he gets a CARD then it is deemed as dealt with! given that he was not shown a card of any sorts

Football Guy - I think you might be right, unfortunately there seems to be no talk of the FA video panal taking a look at this anyway..... Wankers

Martin Race - Maybe they should just allow Arshavin to take a run up and elbow Taylor in the face. or a cage fight.

Pan-European leagues = the death of lower league domestic football.

Football Guy - Love the first idea and if tickets were available, I'd beg, steal or borrow to get some!

As for you second point, I think it's already happening with already 12+ clubs in the Football League on the verge of bankruptcy and many more just above the bread line....... Damn credit crunch!

Anyway peeps, until the next time

Take care

Football Guy

Hi and hello Football fan's it's your old pal Roko the Football Guy, how's it going? I hope all's well wherever you are, things are a lot better in the broom closet here at Football Guy towers, I was hoping to write this yesterday but since I was out until about 3am on St Patrick's day/night I was barely able to wake up, let alone write anything coherent.

Before I go on to anything else I would like to thank and god friend of mine Julian (J-Man) for sorting me out with a ticket for the Arsenal v Hull match, much appreciated....... Also you are welcome for me bailing your ass out in that doubles darts match we had against those two Americans, basically we needed two outer bull's and a bullseye to win and I nailed all three in three darts..... If I didn't have witnesses I would not believe I had done it! So anyway, thanks again J-Man!

Now something happened over the course of the last 30+ hours whilst I was in a semi-coma, Phil Brown and his Assistant Brian Horton accused Cesc Fabresgas of Spitting at Horton in the tunnel after the match. Now Cesc denies that it happened and I would tend to believe him as "innocent until proven guilty" is how the courts work, plus he does not have a track record for doing such things...... On the other hand Phil Brown, one of the accusers said that Wenger didn't shake his hand after either of the two matches earlier in the season yet Arseblogger here proves quite clearly that he was lying.... Hmmmm, so on the one hand we have Cesc who has never done anything like what he is being accused of before in his career and then we have Phil Brown, who whilst accusing one of Arsenal's players for one thing, he goes and lies about the manager on another........ The credibility of Brown as a witness to this incident disappearing faster than cake at a kids birthday party.

Anyway, this is something I want to discuss tonight when I record the Football Guy podcast, which as it stands this week will feature just me! WooHoo, I'm also looking to give the podcast a better name than Football Guy podcast so if you think of any good ones then please let me know!

So without further ado, lets get to this months power rankings

Power Rankings

In The Thick of it 20th - 16th

These teams at the moment are worrying about the top flight status and will be for the foreseeable future. Like winter follows autumn they know they are in for a long cold winter and HOPE that by the time spring come's around things will be considerably more rosy.

This section seems to be getting bigger and bigger each time we visit the Power Rankings! 

* Last months place in brackets

PR 20th (20th) - PL 20th (20th)  WBA

I was going to put West Brom in their own section called "GONE" but I thought that would be mean and having a crap team is bad enough without me singling it out for further ridicule.

I guess mathematically it's not impossible and teams have come back from larger hole's but there just seems to be an air of inevitability about West Brom this season, like we knew they would go down before we thought Stoke or Hull would despite this being that latter two's first times in the Premier League.

At least West Brom fans can console themselves with the fact they are not a historically bad team like a couple of the teams who have finished last in the previous few seasons..... Yes, I'm looking at you Derby.....

PR 19th (19th) - PL 19th (19th) Middlesbrough

Not a lot of change from the bottom two, Boro like West Brom have been stuck in the same position in the league and the power rankings and with game's running out this is not the part of the table to be stuck in.

It's strange but Boro's form has actually been improving over the last five  games. They have managed to pick up six points over that period compared to just one from the five games before that.

I know six points from five games does not sound that great, but when you are down there every point does count and if you scored point like that throughout the course of the season you would amass close to 50 points and be safe every time.

If Boro go down it will be because of the attack, the worst in the league with only 21 in 29 games........ How crap is that? Well I guess when we look who they have upfront are you really that surprised?

PR 18th (16th) - PL 16th (15th) Newcastle

Slightly controversial i know, but I just feel their next four games could kill them. It reads Arsenal(H) Chelsea(H) Stoke(A) Tottenham(A).

Now the really big game there is the Stoke away match, I think if they lose to Arsenal and Chelsea but beat or at least get a point at the Britannia  they should be OK, but to lose three on the spin and the last being to a team you will be battling with to stay up but just be the killer blow for the Toon Army.

PR 17th (18th) - PL 18th (17th) Stoke

This is the first time in a long while Stoke have been out of the bottom three in the Power Rankings and the reason for it is two fold.

On one hand they have picked up a respectable eight points from their last six  games, but more importantly, their next four fixtures are what could easily save them from the drop. It reads Boro(H) West Brom(A) Newcastle(H) Blackburn(H).

Three out of the next four are at home and all the matches are against teams who they are competing against to stay up and will fancy their chances against especially as their at home.

If Stoke can pull nine points from these four games (totally doable) then I think they will be safe!

PR 16th (17th) - PL 17th (16th) Portsmouth

Not really sure what to make of Pompey's form, They only have one loss in their last four games after it seemed they were being beaten every week.

They also have been winning four of their last five league games with 12 minutes.

I think ultimately  they will be safe, I just would not put any money on it what so ever.

Looking over their Shoulder 15th -12th

These are the teams that are thankful that for now there are teams that are worse than them, but need to keep looking over their shoulders in case they get sucked in.

PR 15th (12th) - PL 14th (13th) Sunderland

Only one win since the start of February would have me worried if I were a Sunderland fan, although that have scored enough points so far to be just outside the think of it, but none the less looking over their shoulders.

I don;t think Sunderland have played particularly badly over this period, they just have not been winning which I think can change very quickly as long as you don't let it get in to your head.

PR 14th (15th) - PL 15th (18th) Blackburn

Fat San is edging Rovers ever closer to safety and with two home games coming up against West Ham and Spurs (both without much to play for)they could be in a REALLY strong position come April.

The Fat One really does know what he is doing when it comes to this part of the table and I hope after his debacle at Newcastle he has finally realized that this is his place in life.

PR 13th (13th) - PL 13th (11th) Hull

Hull have managed to pick up a massive four points from their last two games which have really given them a big lift as they looked like a team in free fall.

They deservedly got at least a point against Newcastle but really mugged Fulham the Craven Cottage in a match only Fulham could have won, but that's football sometimes and if you don't take your chances you more often than not get punished.

But that three points at the Cottage was big as now instead of being just a point above Stoke and in 17th in the league, they have a four point cushion which is massive down at the bottom when games are starting to run out.

PR 12th (11th) - PL 12th (12th) Bolton

Not much movement form Bolton since last month, stayed the same in the league but dropped one place in the Power Rankings.

I thought they were safe up until their last two games which were both defeats to Stoke and Fulham and now all of a sudden despite still thinking they will be fine, they have had to start peeking over that shoulder again at a battle they thought they had left a while ago.

They do have West Brom and Boro next in the league so they could easily bounce right back to winning ways.

In the Hunt for Europe 11th - 7th 

For those who are looking at a UEFA cup EUROPA League spot but not quite top 4 spot.

(And since now with Arsenal beating Hull in the FA Cup it means that 7th spot in the league will hold a European place.

PR 11th (7th) - PL 10th (13th) Manchester City

Same old same old for City I'm afraid. Very good at home, super poo away.

At Home only United have won more games (12-9) than City and also are the only team with a better home GD than City.

Contrastingly Away City have only won one match and only Stoke and West Brom have picked up less points.

Also bad for City's hopes of getting back in to Europe next season has been Robinho's lack of goals, none in 2009 as yet.

With Bellamy due to come back from injury soon, they will need him and Robinho in top form if they are to be back in Europe next term.

PR 10th (14th) - PL 11th (16th) Tottenham Hotspur

Spurs are unbeaten in their last five league matches and have since the start of the year picked up 15 of 27 points that have been available and it's paid dividends as they have lept up to mid table and could yet get back in to Europe themselves...... That same Europe they fielded a weakened team in and got knocked out of consequently.

It's a bit like last season where Spurs started to play their best stuff from February onwards, shame it takes them six months to warm up.

I'm sure come this summer Spurs fans will be out in force telling us how this is the year they get in the top four and more importantly finish above Arsenal........ Can't wait for the fun!

PR 9th (10th) - PL 9th (9th) Fulham

I was going to put Fulham below Spurs in the Power Rankings after their two defeats on the spin at home but they answered back strongly with their first away win this season at Bolton. Very important three points there as they face United, Liverpool and Manchester City in Manchester in their next three games and I don't see to many points up for grabs there.

All in all they have done a LOT better than I expected this season, but I will still be tipping them to go down next year.

PR 8th (8th) - PL 8th (7th) Wigan

Wigan, kind of like Fulham were being slightly guilty of resting a little on their laurels. They had not won in the league since January 11th but addressed that with a much needed win over Sunderland at the weekend and find themselves just two points of a European spot.

I would like them to do it as I'm a fan of Steve Bruce and think he should get a bigger job as I'm sure he would be up for the task.

PR 7th (9th) - PL 7th (8th) West Ham

Pretty quietly Gianfranco Zola has turned the Hammers in to a good team and at the same time turned Carlton Cole in to a top option for Fantasy Football (apart from the red card the other week).

And he's done all that without really buying anyone showing that the dross they had before (Alan Curbs - Do enough to survive / Alan Pardew - Fucking Shit!) were to blame for the under preforming Hammers.

Side Note - I was wondering if I too could sue the Hammers for emotional distress for making me have to read these bloody headlines everyday.....

Fifth Spot Chasers 

I think you can guess what that means.

PR 6th (6th) - PL 6th (6th) Everton

I wrote back in January that I thought Everton could catch Aston Villa for 5th spot, needless to say I still believe that.

Put a note in your diary for April 12th as Everton travel to Villa Park that Sunday and I think that will tell us a lot more about who is best of the rest.

PR 5th (3rd) - PL 5th (4th) Aston Villa

How quickly things can change in Football, last month Villa were 3rd in the power rankings and now they are barely in 5th spot.

The most annoying thing about this has been the way a lot of Villa fans have been left scratching their head thinking "what went wrong"?

I'll tell you what went wrong and I've been saying it all season long - YOUR SQUAD IS TOO SMALL!!!!!

For so long Villa were playing at a standard above their station and it's finally caught up with them and it really would not surprise me to see Everton finish above them come May.

Fourth Spot

I think you can guess what that means.

PR 4th (5th) - PL 4th (5th) Arsenal

A warm welcome back to the top four for Arsenal,it really didn't look like that would be the case after their 0-0 draw at home to Fulham a few weeks ago.

There seems to be a new found belief in the Arsenal camp with players coming back from injury and a Quarter final and Semi final to boot in the Champions League and FA Cup respectively.

I do see the FA Cup as a very important competition for the Gunners who's young team needs to taste some Silverware soon so they can make that leap to the next level.

It could end up being quite a good season for Arsenal after looking like quite the opposite for so long.

Title Chasers 3rd - 1st

The big boys, the ones who dream it will be their captain lifting the trophy in may.

(I don't really think there is a title race but still, anything can happen)

PR 3rd (2nd) - PL 3rd (2nd) Liverpool

I'm only putting Liverpool 3rd in the Power Rankings and not 2nd because their GD is worse than Chelsea's.

Two massive wins last week against Real Madrid and Manchester United almost had me put them 2nd but hey.... Someone had to be 3rd.

Also good news for the Reds - Rafa signs a new contract.

Can he take Liverpool to league glory like he has in the Champions League? I'm still not sure, but at least he will get the chance.

PR 2nd (4th) - PL 2nd (3rd) Chelsea

If Guus wins either the league or the Champions League with Chelsea does he stay on for next season?

I'm sure Chelsea would make him an offer he can't refuse if that happens.

I personally don't think they will win either but than again who's to say it wont happen.

Now with Essien and Carvalho back and Drogba scoring again they might be best placeced to catch United and stop them in their pursuit of glory.

PR 1st (1st) - PL 1st (1st) Manchester United

I think the Liverpool result was just a blip on their march to the title, but it did expose something that has been a strong point for United all season that all of a sudden is beging to look like a weakness.

It;s their defence, in their last few games teams have been creating chances against them and since C-Ron is in nothing like the form he was in last season it could turn out to be the last problem United need at just this crucial point of the season.

The next couple of games will be important for the Champions and if the reel of 2/3 wins on the spin i'm sure it will be business as usually at Old Traffod.

So that's in folks, I'll be back tomorrow with the Weekend preview and this weeks podcast. I will also be breaking down the Chapions League draw over the weekend for you all

So until then

Take care

Football Guy

Hi and hello Football fan, A BIG happy St Patrick's day to you all.

Since I'm going to the Arsenal v Hull FA Cup match tonight (found out last night I've got a ticket!) I thought I should write a little brief preview for it. But before I get to that I wanted to briefly make you all laugh -

Sir Alex -

"It is a hard one to take because I thought we were the better team and the score does not reflect that."

Fergie on United 4-1 beating at the weekend.

Really Sir Alex? You thought United were the better team? WOW! Did you also think France were better than England over the weekend in the six Nations? Or maybe that the AC MIlan team in 1989 were over-ratted?

There's defending your team and then there's talking BS, believe be I know about talking BS but this type of BS is straight from the Bull's back side. Shame on you......

Arsenal v Hull

Hull have already won at the Emirates this season and also have a quite amazing record in London FULL STOP this term. I think the only game they have lost in the capital was at Stamford Bridge so they must be at least slightly confident of at least getting a replay out of tonight encounter.

They have kind of been the reverse Newcastle, by that I mean Newcastle once went about 20+ games in the capital without a win until in fact I think they beat Arsenal funnily enough (don't ask me for dates as I can't remember but I'm sure I'm right.

I would imagine that Hull will go with the their strongest line up available, so that means no Kevin "Zinadine" Kilbane who is Cup-tied and no Jimmy "my knees are fucked" Bullard and George "I speak like Cristian Bale in the Dark Knight" Boateng who are both still injured.

On the flip side I would imagine Arsene Wenger will as he does quite often, rest some of his first team players for this tie.

I expect to see Fabianski in goal as Arsenal seems to give the back up keeper the go ahead in domestic cup games (would be interested to see if Arsenal get through if Almunia would play against Chelsea.... I say yes). I've also read that "Ironman" Gael Clichy, who has played ever league game this season for the Gunners (and the previous I think) will also be rested in place of Kieran Gibbs who has played in all the previous rounds. FA Cup goal machine Eduardo is still not available and weekend hero Arshavin is a doubt after having eight stitches in his foot after the Blackburn game..... I wonder if Mr Douif had anything to do with that?

The Gunners have won the cup four times in 11 years, Hull have only reached the semi-finals once. That was 79 years ago, when their path was blocked by Arsenal and I think that will happen yet again. In fact I am putting a "Football Guy Guarantee" that Arsenal will advance to the Semi Finals tonight and face Chelsea.

just for fun

Football Guy's verdict 2-0

I'm hoping to write this months Power Rankings tomorrow, so look out for that.

Until than, have a Happy St Patrick's day and drink responsibly.

Take care

Football Guy