Bentley's Basher
Sunday, 12 July 09, 02:46 PM · Comments (153)
According to The Mirror, David Bentley was punched in the face by an as yet unnamed man - whilst dining with his pregnant fiancèe, Kimberley Mills.
No two ways about it, this was a cowardly bit of work.
But never one to look a gift horse in the mouth or indeed a good suggestion (thanks SSG), it's also a truly golden opportunity for a competition.
You tell me who you think did the despicable deed and ...I want a 'fist whilst in flight' quote from your suggested assailant.
Now, not only is there a prize, but it's is a rather special one. Poshspur has donated this....
A THFC Dream Team print. Quite frankly, this is a rare opportunity to grace your tasteful abode with a unique piece of our club's history. So word up and respect in da house to the venerable Poshspur's generosity.
So get your assault gag caps on.
BIOYC!
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"Just remember one thing my son - no-one is bigger than the club. The club will be here long after you go. Us supporters ain't mugs (well, not too many!). To end - if you don't want us and our club ain't big enough for you, then f*ck right off." Dannyboy
"We're very lucky in the band in that we have two visionaries, David and Nigel, they're like poets, like Shelley and Byron. They're two distinct types of visionaries, it's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water." Derek Smalls
"Can you hear me! Tommy Trinder, Johnny Haynes, Dodi Fayed, Wolfy Smith.......your boys took a hell of a beating!" Sydney Wale
"Each season, there is a team that goes into freefall and gets sucked into the relegation scrap. losing becomes a habit, like winning and if we ain't careful, that team could be us." Dannyboy
"Clearly my words have gone to the highest level. Expect him gone in May" Jolsgonemental
"As a Spurs supporter of no half-measure, I will continue to support Jol, Hughton, the squad and the entire club, to the best of my ability and at all times" Yid 15
"I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass." Jasper Carrott
"White Hart Lane was always a place where I felt I belonged." David Ginola
"I would run through brick walls for Spurs." Graham Roberts
"Even now, when I go over to my mother'S house and dig out the old tracksuit tops I wore, it makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck. I like to think i am part of a special family. I am no longer connected with the club on a daily basis, but i'm delighted with every win and sad about every defeat." Steve Perryman
"Any player coming to Spurs, whether he's a big signing or just a ground staff boy, must be dedicated to the game and to the club. He must never be satisfied with his last performance, and he must hate losing." Bill Nicholson
"Bill did so much for his beloved Spurs that we must never let his legacy fade. He must be our inspiration as we strive to ensure that a new era dawns here at White Hart Lane." Daniel Levy
" 'Oh dear, it's f*cked', is what I've always taken it to mean. I do have O-level Latin. Now they've stuck up a literal translation, in large letters: 'To dare is to do.' The words just stand there, on their own, not making much sense." Hunter Davies
"When Gazza came to the Spurs training ground for the first time got the ball, went round 8 players as if they were not there and then smashed the ball into the net. Just to see him play like that made the hair stand up on the back of your neck. Everybody stood there and applauded him." Terry Venables
"We will not be pushed around by a bunch of north London yobbos." Rupert Lowe, Southampton chairman, shortly before his manager Glenn Hoddle left for Spurs.
""I earned the right to be in the team and fought every game to be in it." Graham Roberts
"The worst thing Spurs ever did was get rid of Keith Burkinshaw. They never replaced him." Graham Roberts
"When you've finished playing football, young man, which is going to be very soon, I feel, you'll make a very good security guard." David Pleat to a 17yr old Neil Ruddock
"If someone wants to give you a bum steer on who we're after, then so be it. If you want to know, ask me, because I have a list of players we want and Robbie Keane isn't on it." Glenn Hoddle, then Spurs manager, shortly before paying 17 mill for ... Robbie Keane.
"The biggest regret of my whole football career was leaving White Hart Lane in 1970.....my interest in football weakened after that. I was heartbroken" Jimmy Greaves.
"I know more about smalz herring than I do about football." Sir Alan Sugar
"The trouble with Christian Gross is that no-one had heard of him. The communication wasn't brilliant and as captain I decided to explain to him how things worked and what the players liked and were used to. I do not believe he listened to a word I said." Gary Mabbutt
"Always had a bit of time, make a little bit of space, look up, bang. And you know he could put it on a postage stamp from 40 yards. Mmmmmmmmm...." Ron Manager aka Paul Whitehouse, Spurs fan on Glenn Hoddle
"I'm a miserable sod." Sir Alan Sugar
"The great fallacy is that the game is first and last about winning. It's nothing of the kind. The game is about glory. It's about doing things in style, with a flourish, about going out and beating the other lot, not waiting for them to die of boredom." Danny Blanchflower
"Man in the raincoat's blue & white army." Spurs fans unable to use George Graham's name, 1999.
"We like a tackle at Tottenham. we're not pansies, you know. " David Pleat
"I was sitting just a few feet away from David Pleat at the World Cup. He's a nice fellow, but the man is mad: certifiably, eye-spiningly mad." Danny Kelly
"The only thing wrong with White Hart Lane is that the seats face the pitch" Les Dawson
-
"Just remember one thing my son - no-one is bigger than the club. The club will be here long after you go. Us supporters ain't mugs (well, not too many!). To end - if you don't want us and our club ain't big enough for you, then f*ck right off." Dannyboy
"We're very lucky in the band in that we have two visionaries, David and Nigel, they're like poets, like Shelley and Byron. They're two distinct types of visionaries, it's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be somewhere in the middle of that, kind of like lukewarm water." Derek Smalls
"Can you hear me! Tommy Trinder, Johnny Haynes, Dodi Fayed, Wolfy Smith.......your boys took a hell of a beating!" Sydney Wale
"Each season, there is a team that goes into freefall and gets sucked into the relegation scrap. losing becomes a habit, like winning and if we ain't careful, that team could be us." Dannyboy
"Clearly my words have gone to the highest level. Expect him gone in May" Jolsgonemental
"As a Spurs supporter of no half-measure, I will continue to support Jol, Hughton, the squad and the entire club, to the best of my ability and at all times" Yid 15
"I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass." Jasper Carrott
"White Hart Lane was always a place where I felt I belonged." David Ginola
"I would run through brick walls for Spurs." Graham Roberts
"Even now, when I go over to my mother'S house and dig out the old tracksuit tops I wore, it makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck. I like to think i am part of a special family. I am no longer connected with the club on a daily basis, but i'm delighted with every win and sad about every defeat." Steve Perryman
"Any player coming to Spurs, whether he's a big signing or just a ground staff boy, must be dedicated to the game and to the club. He must never be satisfied with his last performance, and he must hate losing." Bill Nicholson
"Bill did so much for his beloved Spurs that we must never let his legacy fade. He must be our inspiration as we strive to ensure that a new era dawns here at White Hart Lane." Daniel Levy
" 'Oh dear, it's f*cked', is what I've always taken it to mean. I do have O-level Latin. Now they've stuck up a literal translation, in large letters: 'To dare is to do.' The words just stand there, on their own, not making much sense." Hunter Davies
"When Gazza came to the Spurs training ground for the first time got the ball, went round 8 players as if they were not there and then smashed the ball into the net. Just to see him play like that made the hair stand up on the back of your neck. Everybody stood there and applauded him." Terry Venables
"We will not be pushed around by a bunch of north London yobbos." Rupert Lowe, Southampton chairman, shortly before his manager Glenn Hoddle left for Spurs.
""I earned the right to be in the team and fought every game to be in it." Graham Roberts
"The worst thing Spurs ever did was get rid of Keith Burkinshaw. They never replaced him." Graham Roberts
"When you've finished playing football, young man, which is going to be very soon, I feel, you'll make a very good security guard." David Pleat to a 17yr old Neil Ruddock
"If someone wants to give you a bum steer on who we're after, then so be it. If you want to know, ask me, because I have a list of players we want and Robbie Keane isn't on it." Glenn Hoddle, then Spurs manager, shortly before paying 7 mill for ... Robbie Keane.
"The biggest regret of my whole football career was leaving White Hart Lane in 1970.....my interest in football weakened after that. I was heartbroken" Jimmy Greaves.
"I know more about smalz herring than I do about football." Sir Alan Sugar
"The trouble with Christian Gross is that no-one had heard of him. The communication wasn't brilliant and as captain I decided to explain to him how things worked and what the players liked and were used to. I do not believe he listened to a word I said." Gary Mabbutt
"Always had a bit of time, make a little bit of space, look up, bang. And you know he could put it on a postage stamp from 40 yards. Mmmmmmmmm...." Ron Manager aka Paul Whitehouse, Spurs fan on Glenn Hoddle
"I'm a miserable sod." Sir Alan Sugar
"The great fallacy is that the game is first and last about winning. It's nothing of the kind. The game is about glory. It's about doing things in style, with a flourish, about going out and beating the other lot, not waiting for them to die of boredom." Danny Blanchflower
"Man in the raincoat's blue & white army." Spurs fans unable to use George Graham's name, 1999.
"We like a tackle at Tottenham. we're not pansies, you know. " David Pleat
"I was sitting just a few feet away from David Pleat at the World Cup. He's a nice fellow, but the man is mad: certifiably, eye-spiningly mad." Danny Kelly
"The only thing wrong with White Hart Lane is that the seats face the pitch" Les Dawson
153 Comments · Add yours
MY GRAN GAVE ME THAT 15k WATCH FOR CHRISTMAS!
This is wierd, where is everyone? Has the interweb thingy gone down everywhere except sunny old Cork? Have i missed something? Ooh i get it, theres a boycot on HH, oops ive just broken it, sorry lads.
Aaron Lennon
"your fist may be more accurate, but I'm faster..."
Reply to Sam Barber:
Or Even Dan Levy... "do I get a refund for damaged goods?"
I find this post very weird, someone just got beaten up (no matter who it is) and you want to make a cheap joke out of it. I won't be coming to this site any more, you have gone down in my estimation....this is a very cheap joke at the expense of someone who's just been assaulted...just not funny.
Becks; 'Dats for stealin my inishals,now im ne daddy of de lane'
Reply to Not impressed !!:
Quaker!!!!
Reply to Not impressed !!:
Fantastic news. Only sorry it took quite so long to flush your dull, bleeding heart out.
I also kick children when nobody's looking.
Reply to Not impressed !!:
ARe you David Bentley? Must be. Who else would be that uptight about this kind of thing???
"Superman eh? More like Clarke Kent you t*sser!"
Any disgruntled Arsenal Fan (or perhaps YID?)
'Does your barnet keep its shape when knocked aboutabit, lets see'
Half cut Brylcream rep
Reply to HarryHotspur:
Love this blog but have to agree this is taking it to far. Have a laugh and joke yes, joke about someone being a yid getting punched in front of his pregant partner? No.
Sure HH will respond with something witty but I am gonna leave it and post somewhere else.
Night all and take care...
Disgruntled Spurs Chairman has pop at fraudulent alleged right winger, case closed me thinks
Reply to QuietAtTheLibrary:
Fuck him, he`s a big boy now. What would you prefer the club to provide security for the clowns
do u boys remember the lad still plays for us. Seen a picture of him at training yesterday. Im not really into taking the piss out of our own players
aaron lennon
"you sit down like you have been all season goon bag"
Manuel Almunia; "Esto es para que me busque un gran idiota!"
This doesnt have to be taking the piss out of our own players. Why not just use it as a chance to take the piss out of gooners!
Not funny not clever not even satirical. What a dissapointment to read such crap on this site.
Bentley is a Spurs player which puts him well above you.
Lex Luthor:
"Eat Kryptonite"
Bentley: "Argh shit...Ive just given myself a black eye again, what am I gonna do?"
Mate: "Don't worry Benty...give us ya phone...I 'ave an idea!"
Reply to Not impressed !!:
I find this post very weird, someone just got beaten up (no matter who it is) and you want to make a cheap joke out of it. I won't be coming to this site any more, you have gone down in my estimation....this is a very cheap joke at the expense of someone who's just been assaulted...just not funny.
Fantastic news. Only sorry it took quite so long to flush your dull, bleeding heart out.
I also kick children when nobody's looking.
lol lol lol lol lol!
Ps. And who are these mightier than thou idiots!? It's individuals like them that have ruined this country (...and world) by screaming racism and demanding political correctness every time they cross a T or dot an i.
The irony is that they will all check back here to see what people have said or to see any responses they get contrary to what they have stated.
Lighten up and learn how to interact with society because you're boring the hell out of me!
Ps. Sorry for turning this into a political debate HH.
Aaron lennon slightly miffed that bentleys missus has a better delivery...
Kimberley: "That's for losing your place in the team! How can you expect me to be a WAG if you can't even get a game!?"
Christ on a bike.
I'm assuming that most posters on here have reached adulthood. I'm wondering some have managed that if they are going to go weak with outrage and offense at the slightest thing. How do they get through the day with all the slings and arrows so thoughtless cast about?
Is anyone glad DB took a punch? Not at all. Should the nutter who did it be caught and prosecuted? You bet.
Does that mean we can't have a laugh at an absurd situation? I say no.
Relax.
Sandra Redknapp:
"Take that Darren Bent....Oops, wrong DB. HARRY, START THE CAR!"
I have to say I'm disgusted at this.
This has been posted all night and there's only been a couple of funny comments!
p.s. good prize!
I have previously enjoyed this site..but I have to admit that I am a little uneasy about this post... I guess it shows what sort of person you are if you can find the funny side of this sort of violence - and then lambast those who don't. Hmmmmmm…it's all unimpressive stuff HH, really. How about getting back to stuff we ALL can enjoy?
Kimmy's carrying a grudge baby because, Davo,I've had it in for you
"stop kicking balls into my skip you caaaant...."
Bale:
Thats for using the rest of my Brylcreem!
Reply to SpurstoaMan:
Well- the web is the home of free expression my friend, so if you don't like what you're reading it's probably best to take your traumatised eyes elsewhere. And since it's HH's blog, it's his right to lambast who he likes...
Reply to Matthew:
You call that sorry excuse for an argument 'political debate'? What are you - fourteen?
Distinctly unimpressed by this competition, both the subject matter and the prize, but to go cold turkey on HH because of it smacks of drama queen. End of.
"andy gray" is having a quiet meal with his missus when hes put off his mixed grill plater for 4 by the smell of wet look, after turning around to see what it is he looks back at the wife throws his knife and fork to the table and says to his wife "hes got a fuc*in nerve coming in here its my favorite resturant, hes not even a top 4 player, ill show him c*nt" storming over with his head like a betroot and his man utd shirt ripped off through pure frustration he clumps him whilst yelling "ya brave ya wee lil tosspot" then spits in his meal and says under his breath "i thought it was mecheda when i smelt that gel"
Curious thing, expression. Some use it to pass on the truth and others what they want the truth to be.
Was Bentley 'beaten up'?
No. He was not, nobody died and nobody ended up in an IC unit.
If I was relishing the thought of one of our lot being attacked then I would have used language to convey that zeal.
But I used the word 'cowardly'.
But please, don't let the facts get in the way of a good tree hug on my account.
bentley;thats the last time i take you and your dad out alan!!
I'm admittedly jealous of David Bentley.
1. He's a professional footballer that plays for my beloved Spurs and occassionally for England.
2. He's a good looking chap with a very purdy wag ladyfriend.
3. He's on a tonne of money per week that I would love to get my hands on per year.
But if a man can't enjoy a meal in a restaurant with close friends without running the risk of being clocked by a complete stranger then what the fuck is happening to our country?
Had this been one of our more favoured stars, there would have been more public outcry. Say someone gave Azza or Modders a smack round the head, or what about Woody, Wilson or JD? What if it was more serious, say a stabbing - with incidents of this more prevalent year by year? Two of our boys had brothers murdered recently. That's not funny.
Even if you don't particularly like him, this incident still had the potential to injure him - hence preventing him from either regaining his form with us or jeopardising a move elsewhere for a decent fee. We're relatively lucky in this instant but even so.
In my humble, this competition is not in the best of tastes and we must remember to actually support our players when they are still showing for our team.
If it pans out that the assailant is reported to be a Spurs fan, then that's fucking embarrassing. Let's just hope the muppet paid with a debit/credit card and gets done for criminal assault.
Perhaps I'm just pissed off that I can't think of a witty entry cause that dream-team pic by posh looks rather nice. Shame it wasn't done using a 'Holsten shirt' than one with red on it though.
I'll write this all off as a continued expression of frustration at the lack of any news regarding the shaping up of our new team for the new season.
DavidBentley is a famous person, he is a millionaire, he got punched in the face.
1. Is he the first famous person to be punched for not reason?
No I'd say quite a few famous people have had a cuffing mostly out of jealousy
2. Is he the first person on a night out to get smacked for no apparant reason?
Again no, anybody on this blog who hasn't had the pleasure of minding your own business followed by getting clumped by some thug doesn't now what their missing. (If you're really interested come to Manchester, get the 192 nightbus, sit on the top deck near the back. Oh don't take anything you don't want 'taxed')
3. This is the most worrying point, the point why Spurs are perenial under-achievers. The reason we roll over and die when we are 2-0, 3-0 or the like up against the likes of Manure. In the main our entire squad (maybe not Woody, Wilson, Keane or Gomes) have no fight in them. A big bunch of fairy's, the bullied kids at school!!!! David Bentley is sat eating at a table, he has a f'ckin knife in his hand and someone punches him!!!!!!!!!!!!! STAB HIM IN THE FUCKING NECK YOU YOU NONCE DON'T SIT THEIR CRYING.
Oh to all the Guardian readers showing their disgust, please go back to it I don't want to be seen 'blogging' with lily livered liberals.
ps sorry about the spelling, too angry at the ponces on here to check my dictionary!!
Perfectly good taste HH he's not f'in dying, he's got a black eye, end of!
David Bentley is sat eating at a table, he has a f'ckin knife in his hand and someone punches him!!!!!!!!!!!!! STAB HIM IN THE FUCKING NECK YOU YOU NONCE DON'T SIT THEIR CRYING.
that is funny shit.
Reply to Ginge1:
Ginge
Perhaps I'm a bit too old-school in certain views of how this country is veering away from it's best traits.
This was in a respectable hertforshire restaurant not on a 192 nightbus in mancland (or nightbus in lundin for that matter)
Surely we're allowed small havens in this country where we can relax without fear of being unnecessarily assaulted either verbally or physically? This nations pride was built on respect and civility (if you discount the historical rape and pillage of other countries resources). If someone accidentally steps on your toe, are you not the first one to profusely apologise even though it wasn't your fault?
You know very well had the hairgelled cunt stabbed the other cunt, that he would've been fucked in the courts and the papers and probably in prison as well.
Admittedly we need fight in many of our players, a Spurs fight club would be welcome, but a cowardly hit and run is not the way to do it. Super-Al's full on mano-a-mano with his old man was a bit more of a fair fight.
assailant: wenger
"i vant zat baby ze second kimberly pops it out. it was zen your sign on clause. i vill be there with ze camcorder."
when asked about it later, wenger's only comment was
"i did not zee it"
Reply to Trembly:
Yeah I forgot Super Al, add him to my list of 'Those who will get stuck in'.
I'm with you on your sentiment, however our Country now is what it is, we can try and change it but it seems to be getting worse nt better.
In an ideal world he'd be breaking rocks on a moor for a few months. Even if they catch his attacker, unless he's got previous (for murder!) he's getting a caution or at worse a few hours painting a youth club.
In my opinion a famous sportsman is attacked in a public place for no reason (that we know of -although he could very well have been annoying this other diner with club quotes such as "do you know who I am, I could buy you!" or suchlike), then he is entitled to defend himself in any way he can. You have a knife and fork in your hand your not goin gto put them down to do it? (he was running away, you'd have hoped with a professional athletes speed of body and thought he'd have got him on the turn at the very least!)
Lets be honest can't see anyone doing it to Duncan Ferguson or Roy Keane or even Rab C Hutton for that matter!
Oh and as you aluded (?) to, as a race we have done nothing but fight our way through history. Survival of the Fitest.
ps Who wants DB5 in the trenches with them when WWIII breaks out?
Dude you need to sort yourself out. One of our guys has been hit (probably by a gooner scum) and you want to take this piss. Have you got a brain???
Reply to jolsgonemental:
R U UNWELL or just a gooner in disguise. Sort yourself out you mug.
still a spurs player and fan chaps !!
i do like the banter on here but don't see how articles like this are good for him us or THFC
i for one hope that unless we swap him for young he can actually turn things round at spurs and turn out to be a good signing who just happened to have a mare of a season (bar that goal against the scum).
banter = good negative slating of our own players unless fully justified = pointless and also one of the things that has been holding us back !
It was Bentley himself ! He went for the salt and missed from 2 yards smacking himself in the face as a result!
Reply to mike27skunkspurs&hiphop4life:
I agree if we weren't all slating our own players then we'd be top 4 now, defo our main problem
Reply to mike27skunkspurs&hiphop4life:
explain how this article can possibly lead to 'holding us back' as a club.
Reply to Hodgey:
Actually I heard it was Zokora. He took a swing at one of his new team mates in Seville and just missed as usual.
on a different note, does anyone know where spurs are staying down in devon for their 2 south west games? Wanna go watch a bit of training.....someone must know????
POOR TASTE HH - YOUR BLOG NEVER HAS SCOOPS AND TO ADD TO IT YOU POST BAD TASTED COMPETITIONS. YOU AND YOUR 15 YEAR OLD MATES ARE PROBABLY THE SORT TO PUNCH AN ASS FAN IN THE FACE IF YOU SAW THEM IN A RESTAURANT
THINK YOU'VE LOST A FEW OF YOUR BLOG HITTERS WITH A BAD ATTAMPT AT HUMOUR AND A CONTINUAL LACK OF SUBSTANCE
NOt one decent transfer rumour for us this morning. Jesus christ, pay the wages and get the names in and quit this fcuking about. Barca in 11 days
Reply to ronald:
What blog do you write for or promote. Please let me know and I'll spread the word....to avoid it at all costs. Cock.
Reply to ronald:
Thanks for the CAPS LOCK. If you want a few scoops bob down the pub.
Reply to RJ1882:
I'm dreading the Wembley cup. The Egyptians will be up for it (all the players trying to secure a move somewhere in Europe), Barca will undoubtedly be excellent). At least Celtic are there - hopefully they'll play like they did last summer.
Well i'll be fucked with a pinapple fritter if some of us haven't had the sense of humor sucked out of us by years of this leftie bullshit nanny state that we now live in.
I would bet my left nut that Bently would even find some of this funny 24hrs after the event because he is a bloke. A footballing bloke who can take the piss out of others and take having the piss extracted from him (to those having trouble understanding please ask an adult what a sense of humour is). The man can laugh at himself as many men can. Look up some interview with him on youtube.
This is the problem with these lefty, tree hugging twats. They are now telling the rest of us what is and isn't appropriate to laugh at. Not only that but who should be offended and by what. Piss off and leave the untainted alone please you're ruining my breakfast!!!!
DB: And I controlled it with one touch and lobbed him from fully 40 yards and left him flapping like Jordans undercarriage in a strong breeze!
Almunia: eet wath thirty nine and the thun wath een my eyth you eengleesh prick.
Reply to jolsgonemental:
well you see, being negative makes DB5 and his chums a bit upset, and when they're upset they don't feel they can give it their all.
Thanks.
Reply to Yidfield_General:
What you just said
Reply to RJ1882:
yep; agree with you there RJ. Unless someone comes in this week I think we will be tranferless....,m ok wth that but we do need a striker to replace the manc.....most on here think Obika not really up to it
Also, not too keen to join the Bentley thing; no offence to others but would rather focus on the positives, just my opinion
COYS
On top form this site is quite brilliant and easily the best read of any spurs forum. This thread is a long way form top form. In an entirely predictable way its played to the cheap seats and encouraged posts chuckling about stabbing. Lovely.
Harry, for a wonderfully entertaining and obviously sophisticated chap you have a real problem with criticism. This isn't the first time you've reacted to less than fawning feedback by telling the poster essentially to "f*ck off". The reaction also predictably brings out the usual pack of beta to omega males barking and baying at your heels. No matter how self-righteous you may feel when you write it - unfortunately it comes across as an unnecessary over-reaction and unpleasant bullying. Perhaps like Best, Cook, Hancock and Gazza - we have to accept that the nature of genius is flawed.
Before you say it, I won't f*ck off. I shall continue to drop in for the better posts and I shall continue to enjoy them immensely.
Reply to Trembly:
I don't - and I have always enjoyed HH for football debate - I know not too much has happened in the way of transfers but to pick up on an assault and run a competition on it is pretty low, and doesn't show much imagination from your man HH
Ronald, the cock, apparently
I reckon it was Chritiano Ronaldo. He ran out shouting "I've smashed up a Ferrari and now I've damaged a Bentley!"
Reply to The_Fox:
Yes well down...good come back.
I'm fourteen - lol.
I do hope we sign someone today, regardless of it being Titus Bramble or Lionel Messi. At least then we could have something to moan / cheer about!
Take it you don't want to hear any Jacko jokes?
Reply to Yidfield_General:
I fear that one day I will be telling my kids something like this -
" You know I remember a time when it wasn't an offence to laugh and joke, satorise, send up or make a humorous observation. Now lets just hope that the judge lets you all off lightly for posession of a deadly sense of humour "
Poor articles like this one are poping up everywhere because there is such a lack of transfer news. Personally im quite happy we are not changing our whole team like we usually do, but some people who have blogs to write just post any old rubbish. If theres nout to say then just say nout.
Reply to Hamish:
I wouldn't disagree with any of that.
Bar...My right of reply is bullying? Purleeeease. Sauce for the goose.
Just on the flawed genius bit. As Stephen Fry said of the lame branding of Cook as one, perhaps you might like to produce anyone genius or otherwise amongst us any of us that isn't flawed.
I haven't met anyone that wasn't yet.
I haven't told anyone to f*** off on this piece which rather sadly reveals you guilty of projecting. Hamish, I do believe you're flawed.
See what I did there?
Reply to ronald:
Just on that whole 'thinking' bit, Ronald.
Can you point out where anyone on here asked you to do that?
And at the risk of making you look even more stupid than your own efforts, what the hell is it with people that continually return to this abysmal blog and continuous lack of substance?
What other hobbies do you have? Going into your local MacDonalds everyday and whining they don't have cutlery?
Grow a brain, love.
Here, here Harry, stick it up 'em.
Admittedly not the most erudite of your posts, but still funny. What is it with people. We call ourselves Yids, we slag our players off. We have fun. No-one gets hurt. Not even Bentley. He was shoiked but c'mon. If it happened to you or me, I'm sure spome people after the initial sympathy would laugh about it.
Harry, keep up the good work, and if it looks to contentious, make something up
Never you lot mind about the rights and wrongs of tittering about Bentley getting a right hook. I want to complain about the piss poor prize.
It's amazing what you can get for half an hours work on photshop. Bloody hell. How's about an all expenses paid trip to watch us smash the wham in Asia??
No?
Reply to HarryHotspur:
lmao @ the macdonalds reference
by the way am i the first person on here suffering from swine flu!
Reply to ronald:
ronald you are a proper bookend! although a bookend has one more use than you ya plum! and by the way, there ain't no apparently about it!!!!
nailed on cock imo, if you don't like the fecking blog the don't log onto it...simples!!!
go back to your barbie and ken website!
Reply to adam1882:
Harry please delete this guy for fear he may infect us all down the information superhighway!
eeeeewww lurgie not touching that reply button adam
you haven't thought of a trip to the arsenal trainig ground have ya?
Reply to Ginge1:
Aside: Why the new pic of Prof Steven Hawking, Ginge?
Reply to adam1882:
Nailed on cock? I presume that's more permanent than a strap on?
Reply to HarryHotspur:
When I first saw this post I thought the complainers were being a little over sensitive. But reactions from the knuckle dragging ilk and the general absence of the usual wit and style in the contributions makes me think they may have a point.
It's your gig Harry, and we're glad it is. You can play it anyway you like but Hamish has a point re your reaction to reasoned criticism.
Reply to HarryHotspur:
On the other hand this twat deserves to be told.
Batman "Kapoow"
Robin "KerBlam"
Bentley "Ouch"
Reply to Trembly:
Due to the fact we are both men with intellect!
Reply to gilzeans_barber:
To be fair to the lad (Hamish - sure your older and wiser, maybe, than me but this is a footy blog after all) he did put it in a postive way. As such I shall say he's entitled to his opnion, if we all agreed life would be very boring.
Bentley complained that he had a dirty fork
LINK
Reply to Ginge1:
Nice of you to say so as I usually don't like to blow my own trumpet.
But whats the link with the prof again?
I thought it was for the ability to be able to say "Adriana Lima"? I pulled a bird just like her last night and the night before...two a penny in this town"
Reply to Ginge1:
You make quite good sense for an astro-physicist.
Reply to Trembly:
I tried that...... but I put my back out!
Reply to Ginge1:
yoga is the key I've been told
That says it all about Bentley, he let some cunt hit him and then get away. The same could be said for the rest of our midfield pussy`s, they have not got a pair between them bar Wilson. You can see it on the pitch when playing for our club, a shower of fanny`s parading around in Spurs kits not fit to wear the shirt as far as I`m concerned
Reply to TheSchoolboy:
Reply to A_Felching:
my point from earlier (although you missed the @he should have stabbed him in the neck line!)
Anybody know any good yoga classes?
Reply to A_Felching:
Sorry, you lost me at "a shower of fannies"
Can we specify they are all at least victoria secrets/ sports illustrated swimsuit edition quality fannies?
Reply to Trembly:
The restaurant isnt exactly respectable, it has a VERY dubious history and has had the police round for a quiet chat on more than one occasion for a lot more than just a drunk making a bit too much noise.
Reply to Trembly:
No, no they are not.
Reply to Not impressed !!:
You sap.
As for who hit him............
I do believe it was our Goalkeeper who happened to be having a kickabout next door. An errant cross went in through the open door and Gomes decided to come for it, "KEEPERS" before smashing into DB5!
Reply to PLN:
I stand corrected. It it a bit like this place? LINK
Reply to Ginge1:
You could not give them away on Ebay, and that is saying something
I'm obviously not going to say anything that would get HH in any kind of legal pudding, but like i say, its not exactly the Ritz! The place becomes a psuedo-nightclub after the kitchen closes and thats when some of the naughty stuff goes on (apparently and allegedly you understand)
There's a certain tree in Bruce Castle Park that, if you hug, is guaranteed to misinterpret your intentions. It's always wise to establish ground rules before hugging any tree, lest it infer your advances are sexual.
Then, of course, is the sexual orientation of the tree. Some are male, some female. It's best to know what you're getting into.
Also, bear in mind that some trees regard an uninvited hug as tyrespass upon its person.
Tree-hugging used to be ok in the 60s - even up until the early 80s. Everything was so free and easy, and no one asked any questions. There were no complications and few consequences. Now, if you hug a tree, you get a warning from the Society of Foresters or are frog-marched into marrying it.
I sincerly hope that somebody walks up to one of you who think this is funny and twats you in the mush, better still headbutts you missus.
That would be exactly the same, would you still be laughing?
If you think Im moving to Birmingham you can take that! - Thwack as his Missus leaves the table!
I'm devastated.
Bentley gets hit, IN THE FACE and you lot just make jokes about it!!! His woman WHO WAS PREGNANT, was near him and there is every chance some people OF COLOUR, were near! This was a sexist, racist, pedophilic attack and you make jokes??!!!!
When you should be thanking me for donating my artwork to the winner.
I thank you.
Anyone who is in the market for some high quality portraiture of the oil and watercolour variety, produced by a charming Spur at horrific prices, should make there way to my web site...
On the attack, it'll ruin Aston Villa's Calendar shoot for August. Think of the costs in Photoshopping. Software... not buying prints!
Reply to Now ex member:
So, which username were you known as "ex member" so we can establish if you visit again?
Reply to Now ex member:
yes, I would certainly laugh it is was you, and your missus.
Exclusive CCTV footage of punching in restaurant incident.
LINK
I know of a certain tree... Not personally, you understand.
Reply to jolsgonemental:
Some people really need to lighten up or just f*** right off.
You really are a prize plum for doing this mate. No doubt you'll come back with some hilarious put down and also accuse me of being oversensitive etc etc but really what a deeply unfunny plank you are.
Alright in case things get litigious, I'd like to distance myself from this competition.
I think it's in very poor taste for the record and am NOT comfortable for my work to be used in this way.
Reply to HarryHotspur:
Rather than ridiculing people for thinking or having a different opinion Harry to your Daily Star reading pals you should be grateful that there's a varied spread of people who visit your site some of whom have more rounded values and don't just want trashy headlines with an equally trashy competition - your Daily Star readers will still come Harry, just try and get some better thought out articles and you may get a larger following - just a suggestion I 'thought' of
Stupid cock Ronald
Reply to jolsgonemental:
Yeah, that was exactly what I said, me getting hit, wasn't it. Wise up you div. Random attacks of voilence are not funny full stop. How many people have been murdered innocently recently? Any head blow can cause fatal trauma so while he may just have a black eye or whatever this could have been worse. Oh, and it would have been fucking hilarious if his missus got that stressed that she miscarried wouldn't it?
I'm sure JD is pissing himself at this too in light of his recent family incedents.
who's been talking?
off topic but feeling for John Hartsons family at this moment in time. Gents; whilst i dont want to use his problems to promote self awareness; we should all check our health regularly.
lets hope he recovers
Reply to Ex member:
JD is here???
Shit, i hope he isnt with Janet Jackson.
How crass will this all look??
Kimberley: "David! I've told you before it's pronounced Q-U-I-C-H-E. Next time, just ask the waitress for a cheese flan. Do not ask her for a quickie."
HH.
"Just on the flawed genius bit. As Stephen Fry said of the lame branding of Cook as one, perhaps you might like to produce anyone genius or otherwise amongst us any of us that isn't flawed.
I haven't told anyone to f*** off on this piece which rather sadly reveals you guilty of projecting. Hamish, I do believe you're flawed.
See what I did there? "
Yes. You over-reacted. Again. Note the use of the word "essentially" - what you did there didn't work. Look I don't want to get into a slagging match - merely making an observation that you are inadvertently underlining.
Incidentally, Mr Fry talks of Cook from the perspective of a fellow manic depressive. What is considered normal behaviour for Fry is not for the rest of us. By non bi-polar standards his flaws resulted in extreme self-destructive behaviour as has been well documented. In the same way Gazza's, Best's and Hancock's flaws were extreme - beyond the norm. I stand by the "lame" use of the phrase.
Just be grateful you're being referred to in such exalted company - stop nit-picking - and take the observations in the spirit they are given. You can be a bully.
Reply to Ex member:
To be fair, these random acts of violence are a blessing. Without it, there wouldn't be one of the most hilarious internet videos of 2 'happy-slappers' getting KO'd by their victim.
*yawn*
Speaking as one who was attacked about 7 years ago whilst out drinking in Belfast, in a dodgy part of town by what can only be described as teenagers, I can understand what Bentley feels.
The main "attacker" just came up without warning, and started throwing punches and kicks. His friends all stood behind him, fists clenched, ready to join in. I was pretty pissed, but had the common sense to just block and 'bob and weave' without retaliating, as that woulda cost me greatly.
When I asked him, what's his problem, his friend interjected, "Cos he feels like it".
In the hospital, with blood covering most of my face and clothes from my broken nose, I was able to laugh about it with other people in casualty. They thought I looked like I'd been in a car crash.
You've gotta make light of these things in life, as long as there isn't much damage done.
Reply to Hamish:
Hamish, you masqueraded yourself. Don't try and corrupt language with me, old girl. How is a mild rebuff over reaction?
And this 'bully' business. How so? Because I'm intolerant? Did I give you a Chinese burn or nick your dinner money. Come on Hamish. Stop the guff. It's me.
You called the word flawed and now you dig a hole that reveals (to those of us in the Northern hemisphere) the feet of Chinamen.
What worked or didn't is simply opinion. Very valid, a but only opinion. Funny, as well as sad, is subjective.
Nit picking? Come on, we're talking here. Or I was.
Simply exercising my own right to reply. Would you begrudge me that? Especially when you seek to contrive a reason as to why Fry said what he did.
Here's the piece for anyone that hasn't fallen asleep yet.
LINK
Oh, & I'm rarely grateful when told to be.
Where the fuck is Klinsmann on that 'dream team' print?
Reply to Ginge1:
Jesus. You Ill informed nob. I have enjoyed this competition and think people are completely over reacting. But please dont anyone associate this brainless thugs views with anyone elses...
If they had killed DB would we have got £17mill insurance money????
Ok maybe killing him is a bit harsh but a shotgun to the kneecaps could still result in a full payment from the insurers......are there any insurance brokers out there that can clarify this situation??
Would it work for Keane, Bent and Pav too?? This could be the way to go to make sure we receive our outlay in full.
P.S. I bet the missus was thinking the arrogant c#nt deserved it.....the only chance she had of a miscarriage was if she pissed herself laughing too much.
I think the funniest part was that his mate chased the guy and got beaten up........reminds me of Rodney in Only Fools and Horses chasing a guy and when he catches up with him he shits himself and ends up getting chased!
Reply to Anderslecht:
Thanks for that.
Reply to Nico Claesen Ate My Wife:
The "Fans" voted for the dream team on the Spurs web site. It's a miracle anyone over 30's in it! Besides, how would Klinsman fit in above who was selected?!
I just badly rendered it, don't shoot the...photoshop...person?
Reply to yidarmy:
Reply to weejp:
Really? Are you from Belfast or were you there visiting? I'm from that area myself and have never been involved or even seen anything like that, and I've been going out in it for 10 years.
Must've been just bad luck.
Still no signings - fcuk me. So bored with Spurs. Imagine after all this the season starts and we get spanked by Liverpool. I'll probably kill myself.
Reply to RJ1882:
You should go out for a beer with JGM to cheer yourself up.
Reply to Poshspur:
Maybe. A beer - that could be the answer? Going out for dinner later though for the Mother-in-Laws b'day, I need to keep my wits about me.
If we coul just make a big signing the joy would return. Kyle Naughton? seriously? I hope we arent contemplating selling Hutton and replacing him with a youngster?
i've been randomly attacked in the street twice. it wasn't fun, but then that probably wasn't the point. I've gotta say that looking back at the crowd of 8 who started laying into me isn't a cherished experience, but i doubt i'd be gettin as sensitive as some of you guys.
And if HH & Poshspur offered me a chance to win a magical prize by poking fun at myself, i'd be delighted to have gained from the whole episode. Mayb DB will be more upset when he realises his face aint in the dream team!
Its a date
I actually live around the corner from the restaurant where it kicked off the other night and I have all the facts.
Apparently, DB was on the way to the loo and a group of guys were standing there with green or black shirts (rather like a ref), DB apparently tried to go round them but hurtled himself to the ground (must be some kind of pre season training stunt), how many times did I see him failing to get passed someone last season, with his lightening pace? Anyway, the guys walked away very slowly, naturally he gave chase but they outwalked him.
Tis a lovely village with the real Martin Chivers and Mabbsy living here.
Reply to Ex member:
Well said
I do love your site, Harry but I too think this is going a bit too far. I'm not an over-sensitive soul and have been involved in plenty of (Belfast!) punchups myself but there's something not quite right about getting even a bit of a laugh at the expense of a guy who is only out having a meal with his girl. Won't stop me from revisiting but it feels like it is giving some sort of warped acceptance to this kind of thing in general.
fuck me
why has everyone crawled up their own arseholes about a cheap gag at someones expense.
Nice one poshspur for the prize
last time i checked we were english (well, most of us on here), that means we can laugh at other peoples misfortunes, we even laugh at our own - thats why we are better than everybody else.
get a sense of self awareness and tell a micheal jackson joke or two.
You might crack a smile
or a fart
now that would be funny
harry hotspur is full of shit. ur stories either come from papers or are made up. and yes before more of u ask, we are related, he is my cousin. he still talks nonsense though
Guys, let's just put this in perspective, he got punched, not stabbbed, killed, beaten to a pulp, etc, and is absolutely fine. While no-one wants to see anyone punched, let's not make out like it was the biggest deal in the world.
I got punched once by a random guy for no apparent reason, and the following day was taking a lot of banter from my mates and joining in with it.
By making a joke about it, no-ones condoning the behaviour, just trying to have a bit of a laugh at a bad situation.
Could be the final poster on this one and since I can't pass up the opportunity to make believe that I'm Darcus Howe, here goes.
I have to fall on the side of the "Disappointed's from Bournemouth" with today's blog. It certainly sparked debate, sadly much of it negative and petty, which is unusual.
Being slapped by a stranger isn't in itself terrifying, but the preceding seconds are.
Having to ascertain whether or not either yourself or a loved one are about to be knifed or shot, is something none of us ahould have to face,
It's not funny.
This site is fun and I will continue visiting, but I really believe that you misjudged this one.
Reply to modgod:
hi sully
Brüno did it.
"Vassup, I'm Brüno [slap]"
Reply to Ginge1:
nah ya should be ok, i got tamiflu!!!
Reply to Ronald the thinking cock:
ronald fuck off then, by the way change yourname to ronald cockwasher! if you dont want to read the star you dont buy it, if you dont want to read this blog then dont log on!!!
ronald, get a good nights sleep rather than sitting up till 2.30am waiting for your wife to go to bed so you can look at doggie porn on ya pc!!! add me to the list of daily star reading arseholes! would rather be that than a internet poodle gromer!!!
Harry I think my Almunia comment on a prvious blog should nail it.
Reply to Nico Claesen Ate My Wife:
And where the fuck is Timothee Atouba
Reply to Ginge1:
hi Ginge , glad someone one answered that for me as at work i have limited access to internet
explain how this article can possibly lead to 'holding us back' as a club. ?
hi jolsgonemental .
answer= the attitude of some sections of our support clearly hinder us as a club as we are veiwed as fickle fans who ruin certain players eg. Bentley , bale , GDS etc
I would love to see (out of curiosity mainly)
that if we all got behind the likes of Redknap, Jenas Bentley & bent .
that our on the pitch performances would improve dramaticly .
how many top clubs slate their players so openly on matchday and gain results ?? ...i can't think of any !
especialy youngsters we are trying to mold ....we don't want to scare players out of trying things out of the norm for fear of being lambasted by those who come to watch .
you don't get gazza's and cantona's this way .
you get people who play safe ..... cos they would rather just keep their head down than attract the negative attention from some sections of our support .
imagine being Jenas or Chimbo ..... hardly going to inspire/motivate you to bleed for a club that doesn't want or support you .
Reply to Nico Claesen Ate My Wife:
Where the fuck is Nico Claesen in that dream team print?!?
How do you like them apples?
Downing going to villa. And i don't mean he's off for a week in a detatched spanish house. GET THE FUCK IN
Reply to TheSchoolboy:
thank fuck for that!!! now see the bentley ashley young swap deal rumours in the press!