Cheers - JJ
Okey Doke Football Podcast is available every Friday morning, subscribe here: http://feeds.feedburner.com/OkeyDokeFootball
Bullshit Ahoy! No wait, come back!
Tuesday, 12 February 08, 02:45 PM
Those of you who don’t live in Ireland will surely have heard of RTE pundit Eamonn Dunphy at this stage. He’s the guy who called Niall Quinn a creep on air; he’s pissed off every Irish manager
in my lifetime and changes his opinions on Arsenal and Man United without batting an eyelid. He’s the guy who said Alex Ferguson had reached the end of his reign in 2005 and that they wouldn’t
contend for the Premier League last season. Then a few months ago talked about how Ferguson was the fulcrum of a “special club” who don’t react to knee-jerk press reactions after a bad
performance.
He also claimed that Sven Goran Eriksson and Garth Crooks had a little more than an interviewer/interviewee relationship. But in amongst a lot of hyperbole, he makes a lot of sense too.
Gerard Houllier for instance, was seen as a football incompetent long before any of his peers; he saw that Ruud Gullit was a “spoofer”; that Brian Kerr’s paranoia was affecting the players; that over-rated players like Gerrard, Lampard, Beckham, Ferdinand and even Henry were more hype than substance and was more than prepared to stand over these views. In short, between the nonsense and the sense, there is a little bit of a national treasure there and certainly one who makes RTE’s Champions League nights far more interesting than Jamie Redknapp and the rest of the guff brigade at Sky and ITV.
Of course many of you will have heard of Dunphy from his work on Roy Keane’s autobiography; a solid read but one great big wasted opportunity in my opinion. I read an article by the superb Paul Kimmage some time back that told of how Dunphy had (if I remember correctly) barely looked at the transcripts of his interviews with Keane with only about six weeks left to his publisher’s deadline. If memory serves correct, someone had been hired to transcribe the tapes as well, something which can definitely create problems for a writer when trying to decide how a book should flow.
Kimmage, who produced an excellent autobiography of Tony Cascarino a few years back (though Cascarino’s propensity for spinning tales makes you take a lot of what is said with a pinch of salt), also wanted to write Keane’s book and had informal chats with him about doing so. Personally, I think Kimmage or several other journalists would have done a better job considering what an interesting subject Keane was at the time and still is today.
A few years down the line and Dunphy is obviously not so under Keane’s thumb as he once was. This week, during a radio interview he called the Sunderland manager a ‘bullshitter’ who should concentrate on his job instead of getting involved in things that didn’t concern him. Again, it’s most likely Dunphy’s attempt at proving he’s no one’s puppet and he also clearly desires to be as controversial as possible as often as he can.
The full rant reads as follows: “I know Roy well and the one thing he hated when I knew him and when we were working on that book, he hated the bullshit that was part of manager-speak and part of player-speak. And now he holds these lengthy press conferences every week in which he anoints David O’Leary to be the next Ireland manager, anoints Terry Venables as the next Ireland manager, he’s talked about the Cork GAA dispute, talked about how wonderful it is for the Premier League to play more games abroad and he’s just become rent-a-quote. And it’s quite extraordinary. This is a sharp, smart, outstanding human being and he’s just been sucked into that awful Premier League vacuousness and it’s sad to see Roy Keane bullshitting, but he is. But there you go. It happens.”
Keane’s press conferences have become a regular fixture on Sky Sports and BBC certainly, but it’s not due to bullshit and easy headlines alone. It’s more to do with his propensity to actually talk about topics that other managers won’t touch. He’ll talk about other people’s players; he’ll talk about other managers and he’ll talk about things that have absolutely nothing to do with Sunderland. It’s great, why not upset the apple cart; why not piss off everyone else in the league. Frankly, this time around I think Dunphy has got the wrong end of the stick.
The RTE man is surely aware that Keane gets asked some of the most inane questions known to man each week. Sky, BBC and local radio reporters want quick, easy quotes for unchallenging stories that are lapped up by most. But Keane, unlike most, complicates matters for his own entertainment as much as anything.
So far in the Premier League’s history it seems that only the Corkman and the genius of Gordan Strachan have ever tried to subvert the interviews with some sense and a little humour. ‘Gordon can we have a quick word’, one Sky hack asked the Scotsman while he was in charge of Southampton. ‘Velocity’ he replied and walked up the tunnel. His chat about yoghurts nearing their sell by date troubling him more than player injuries was also a classic.
And indeed, so was this exchange…
Reporter: Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are the right man to turn things around?
Strachan: No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, "No, I think they should have got George Graham because I'm useless."
In amongst the guff that Keane has to tell reporters, like Strachan, he provides the odd gem on players bringing in milk, Craig Gordon’s hairstyle and Dwight Yorke enjoying a good ride… on a bicycle that is.
Dunphy, like myself and Mark, has perhaps found that this Champions League-less period of the season makes it damn harder to come up with decent things to write about (and yes if you think this post is a bunch of shite, I get the irony).
Most likely, in a few weeks time, if Sunderland get closer to guaranteeing safety in the league, Dunphy will once again be singing from the rooftops about Keane. I suppose there are just certain times when you shouldn’t take what the manager or the journalist say very seriously at all.
But, despite Eamo's faults, there is never a time when this doesn’t deserve to be watched again.
Later, JJ
PS: We’re recording the podcast tomorrow night so we’ll be online on Thursday morning. If you haven’t voted by the way, and you happen to like our podcast, can you give us the nod for 'Best Football Podcast' over at Soccerlens. We’re in a royal rumble for the title so get your friends, their friends and people you barely know to vote for us. Cheers.
Okey Doke Football Podcast is available every Friday morning, subscribe here: http://feeds.feedburner.com/OkeyDokeFootball
He also claimed that Sven Goran Eriksson and Garth Crooks had a little more than an interviewer/interviewee relationship. But in amongst a lot of hyperbole, he makes a lot of sense too.
Gerard Houllier for instance, was seen as a football incompetent long before any of his peers; he saw that Ruud Gullit was a “spoofer”; that Brian Kerr’s paranoia was affecting the players; that over-rated players like Gerrard, Lampard, Beckham, Ferdinand and even Henry were more hype than substance and was more than prepared to stand over these views. In short, between the nonsense and the sense, there is a little bit of a national treasure there and certainly one who makes RTE’s Champions League nights far more interesting than Jamie Redknapp and the rest of the guff brigade at Sky and ITV.
Of course many of you will have heard of Dunphy from his work on Roy Keane’s autobiography; a solid read but one great big wasted opportunity in my opinion. I read an article by the superb Paul Kimmage some time back that told of how Dunphy had (if I remember correctly) barely looked at the transcripts of his interviews with Keane with only about six weeks left to his publisher’s deadline. If memory serves correct, someone had been hired to transcribe the tapes as well, something which can definitely create problems for a writer when trying to decide how a book should flow.
Kimmage, who produced an excellent autobiography of Tony Cascarino a few years back (though Cascarino’s propensity for spinning tales makes you take a lot of what is said with a pinch of salt), also wanted to write Keane’s book and had informal chats with him about doing so. Personally, I think Kimmage or several other journalists would have done a better job considering what an interesting subject Keane was at the time and still is today.
A few years down the line and Dunphy is obviously not so under Keane’s thumb as he once was. This week, during a radio interview he called the Sunderland manager a ‘bullshitter’ who should concentrate on his job instead of getting involved in things that didn’t concern him. Again, it’s most likely Dunphy’s attempt at proving he’s no one’s puppet and he also clearly desires to be as controversial as possible as often as he can.
The full rant reads as follows: “I know Roy well and the one thing he hated when I knew him and when we were working on that book, he hated the bullshit that was part of manager-speak and part of player-speak. And now he holds these lengthy press conferences every week in which he anoints David O’Leary to be the next Ireland manager, anoints Terry Venables as the next Ireland manager, he’s talked about the Cork GAA dispute, talked about how wonderful it is for the Premier League to play more games abroad and he’s just become rent-a-quote. And it’s quite extraordinary. This is a sharp, smart, outstanding human being and he’s just been sucked into that awful Premier League vacuousness and it’s sad to see Roy Keane bullshitting, but he is. But there you go. It happens.”
Keane’s press conferences have become a regular fixture on Sky Sports and BBC certainly, but it’s not due to bullshit and easy headlines alone. It’s more to do with his propensity to actually talk about topics that other managers won’t touch. He’ll talk about other people’s players; he’ll talk about other managers and he’ll talk about things that have absolutely nothing to do with Sunderland. It’s great, why not upset the apple cart; why not piss off everyone else in the league. Frankly, this time around I think Dunphy has got the wrong end of the stick.
The RTE man is surely aware that Keane gets asked some of the most inane questions known to man each week. Sky, BBC and local radio reporters want quick, easy quotes for unchallenging stories that are lapped up by most. But Keane, unlike most, complicates matters for his own entertainment as much as anything.
So far in the Premier League’s history it seems that only the Corkman and the genius of Gordan Strachan have ever tried to subvert the interviews with some sense and a little humour. ‘Gordon can we have a quick word’, one Sky hack asked the Scotsman while he was in charge of Southampton. ‘Velocity’ he replied and walked up the tunnel. His chat about yoghurts nearing their sell by date troubling him more than player injuries was also a classic.
And indeed, so was this exchange…
Reporter: Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are the right man to turn things around?
Strachan: No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, "No, I think they should have got George Graham because I'm useless."
In amongst the guff that Keane has to tell reporters, like Strachan, he provides the odd gem on players bringing in milk, Craig Gordon’s hairstyle and Dwight Yorke enjoying a good ride… on a bicycle that is.
Dunphy, like myself and Mark, has perhaps found that this Champions League-less period of the season makes it damn harder to come up with decent things to write about (and yes if you think this post is a bunch of shite, I get the irony).
Most likely, in a few weeks time, if Sunderland get closer to guaranteeing safety in the league, Dunphy will once again be singing from the rooftops about Keane. I suppose there are just certain times when you shouldn’t take what the manager or the journalist say very seriously at all.
But, despite Eamo's faults, there is never a time when this doesn’t deserve to be watched again.
Later, JJ
PS: We’re recording the podcast tomorrow night so we’ll be online on Thursday morning. If you haven’t voted by the way, and you happen to like our podcast, can you give us the nod for 'Best Football Podcast' over at Soccerlens. We’re in a royal rumble for the title so get your friends, their friends and people you barely know to vote for us. Cheers.
Okey Doke Football Podcast is available every Friday morning, subscribe here: http://feeds.feedburner.com/OkeyDokeFootball
Like this blog? Help spread the word: 
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Stantastic Logic at Work
Monday, 04 February 08, 11:03 PM
"I'm the boss, I'm the gaffer and at the end of the day what I say goes." Steve Staunton. Fool of a gaffer.
Well I hope y’all have underfloor heating cos it looks like hell just froze over. Does that even make sense? To be honest, I don’t care, because in a world where Steve Staunton can find a new job nothing makes sense. Leeds United fans if you thought the club had seen lows before – relegation, fish tank controversies, Brian Deane, Dennis ‘OompaLoompaLumpityDoo’ Wise – today truly proves that if there is a god then he hates you. He really hates you. He hates you so much that Stan is your new assistant manager. A horrible fate indeed.
Stan has made himself very busy today; fresh from getting his first job in club management that stretched beyond lining up cones and giving out bibs, he’s started to slag off possible new Irish manager Giovanni Trapattoni. Plenty of news outlets have centered on the differences in both men’s management records (Trapattoni’s fantastic; Stan ‘did the double’ over San Marino) but to me the greatest piece of tosh in amongst the former Irish gaffer’s quotes came with the idea that ‘we Irish are something a little bit different’ as a reason why Traps couldn’t manage us.
How are we different Stan? Are we unique in that Irish players only understand a high-tempo long ball game? Because that’s all you thought of them in the away games against Slovakia and the Czech Republic anyway. Back when Shay Given was repeatedly asked to hit Kevin Kilbane on the head for someone to run on to. When it didn’t work the first ten times Stan, what were your instructions? ‘Well sure, they’ll hardly expect us to do it again the second half will they?’ Genius. Stone cold genius.
Do the Irish understand how to outfox a Welsh central midfield containing a Championship player and some dude from the MLS? Apparently not, that’s why you played two holding midfielders against Wales at Croke Park. A mighty intellect this man, mighty. What about the myths off the field? That we like a pint? Certainly we do, but Robbie Keane scored 31 goals in the last calendar year while treading a fine dietary line at Spurs. He scored four goals in the entire qualification series for Euro 2008; three against San Marino at home and one in the pointless group finale against Wales where Don Givens brazenly used only one holding midfielder. The cheek of it Stan; but sure at least Keane and everyone else could have a pint when you were manager.
Whatever Stan ‘understands’ about the Irish players led to shambolic training sessions with him huffing and puffing in practice games. It led to tactical incoherence and column writers stumped at finding words for each new low for Irish football. That Trapattoni might make the players understand there’s a better way of doing things might just be beneficial you’d have to think. Can’t see a defence that he sends out conceding six to Cyprus over two games.
Staunton also slagged off the Italian’s knowledge of our players and their talents, or "what they're all about" as he puts it. Is this the Steve Staunton who played Andy Keogh – a striker – at right wing; Steve Finnan – a right back – at left back; John O’Shea every bloody where; Joey O’Brien – a full back – as the midfield anchor; not to mention Kevin Kilbane as a centre forward when San Marino were level with us in injury time?
It really is hard to sum up my lack of respect for Stan when it comes to management; how could anyone have an ounce of it for him after Ireland’s glib showings in the last qualifying tournament? His tetchiness and frankly irritating assumption that the crowd was on his side rather than that of the press was also disgraceful. It wasn’t about sides; we all knew you were doing a terrible job Stan. The press anxiety in every column was due to Staunton’s ineptitude, not some paranoid agenda. Let’s face it, all the press had to report was his feeble mumblings and idiotic decision making. That was damning enough without any window dressing.
Stan is a small man. A small petty man. Bloody hell, thinking about it, he might just fit Leeds like a glove. But now, alas, as I write, it seems Trapattoni will stay in Austria and Billy Davies is one of the favourites for the Ireland job. Dark times all round, particularly for Irish Leeds fans.
Later folks, JJ
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Magic Beans
Thursday, 10 January 08, 05:08 PM
Fabio Capello talking about the Italian psyche in 2006: “We’re convinced
we know more than the next guy.”
Okay, it might be a little cruel but I couldn’t help but think of this quote when I looked at this picture of oul’ Fabio and Stuart Pearce having a chinwag about the England players. True enough,
he does preface this with the words, “We Italians are over critical and arrogant, all of us”, but still you’d have to wonder how much of what ‘Psycho’ is telling him really hit home with
Fabio?
This is a man with a startling managerial record talking to a fella who managed one of, if not the, most boring Premier League side ever not to get relegated. Last season’s Manchester City were a
disgrace to football, and while Pearce’s stock rose somewhat after the U-21 European Championships in Holland last summer, no one really believes he’s a top class coach. Certainly not in the
Italian mould of great thinkers anyway.
Capello apparently is still searching for an Englishman to compliment his backroom staff but that search may prove as difficult as the grand charade that is the hunt for a new Irish manager. Think
of an Englishman with tactical nous (god I hate that phrase but alas, it fits). Anyone leap forward? If this was ten years ago the unfortunate truth is the choice would most likely have been Howard
Wilkinson; in Sven’s wisdom he hired Steve McClaren and Sammy Lee. Therefore finding a suitable man for this role has never been, and will never be, an easy choice.
My candidate, should Capello really want someone English-born to run ideas by, is the man he beat to the job – Harry Redknapp. An Englishman who understands good football, loves talking tactics and
from an early age (check out The Times podcast interview with him from a few weeks back) has understood how out-thinking an opponent is worth as much as pace or power.
While I doubt Redknapp would take the job, I’d still see him as the outstanding candidate so it’s back over to Capello and his background staff to persuade the Portsmouth manager or someone of
similar knowledge (though I can’t think of anyone) to get on board.
The phrase ‘slim pickings’ defines the search for the Ireland manager at present, or at least in those linked with the post in the press. The same names recycled again and again. Today the Irish
Independent led with Gerard Houllier as the choice of the three man committee of Don Howe, Roy Houghton and Don Givens. Last Wednesday it was Kenny Dalglish. Mick McCarthy has even had to rule
himself out. At this stage, the committee have been in business for several weeks and the question has to be asked – who exactly have they talked to?
Terry Venables confirmed last week that he’s had no approach. Graeme Souness too has ruled himself out due to no approach (in fact he thought the job had been given to Venables… surely something
that could have been cleared up with Houghton during the ad breaks on The Premiership’s Saturday night show on RTE?). So who have they been speaking to? Howard Kendall?
We now know that it will be up to FAI president John Delaney and another blazer to negotiate Ireland’s fixture list for the World Cup qualifiers at a meeting on 16 January. It’s a dark thought and
the image of Delaney coming back to Abbottstown with a bag of magic beans and 10 away ties continues to crop up every now and then.
Capello’s search is certainly the easier one here as he’s really only making a conciliatory move to appease the FA and the English media who still, quite unbelievably, question his credentials to
manage a side going nowhere. Ireland’s three men committee you’d suspect are merely seeing how many hotel lunches they can get on the FAI cheque book before anyone actually asks what they’re up
too.
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Totaalvoetbal, Bloody Divots
Thursday, 03 January 08, 03:17 PM
Try as I might, the sight of one particular goal still turns my stomach every time I see it. You can watch it here after about two minutes of nostalgia and The Pogues. It’s a simple looping header from Wim Kieft at Euro ‘88, one with a wicked bounce, as well as another
Dutchman standing in an offside position out of shot.
But it’s not the injustice of the linesman's decision – after all Alan McLoughlin was standing three yards offside when Kevin Sheedy blasted home against England at Italia ’90 – instead it’s just the sickening amount of time it takes to go in. Ireland slowly but surely seeing a semi final berth slip out of their grasp.
The flight of the ball barely makes sense, some odd divot is hit and football history follows. How many times have you seen Marco Van Basten’s volley in the final? At least a hundred if you’ve even a passing interest in football, near a thousand if you happen to actually like the game. No divot, no volley, no Marco Goalo volley of the century.
Kieft’s goal disgusts me to this day. I can’t help it.
The path of Dutch football rarely makes sense, be it to do with divots, lunch time seating arrangements or even the sheer oddity that is Dirk Kuyt. Therefore, Ireland’s exit at Euro ’88 to that goal should just be chalked down as another oddball moment in the history of a nation that’s usually too busy rowing to win tournaments; despite the fact that they’re often technically the best side on show.
There was a book released a few years ago by football writer David Winner, entitled Brilliant Orange: The Neurotic Genius of Dutch Football, which I picked up again recently. When I say ‘recently’, I mean out of a desperate attempt to do anything with Christmas other than drink, eat, eat, eat, drink… oh, and avoid generally awful Christmas TV (I include nearly every live Premier League game over the festive period in that too – cheers Sky for not showing Chelsea v Villa).
It did the trick. When you see a chapter on how the ‘Provos’ changed football you generally associate it with terrace violence in Northern Ireland’s top flight in the late seventies. However, in Winner’s book he’s referring to a 1960s group of Dutch anti-establishment protestors. Their tactics for social reform basically revolved around annoying the police with clever non-violent protests and pranks to such a point that the only logical conclusion was that they would end up getting a good kicking. Public support and press headlines followed.
The book itself is about the “idea of Dutch football” rather than the Dutch national side or even their club teams. The spirit of total football, so goes the argument, comes in part from inspiration such as the Provos, who managed to free themselves from the post-war conservatism of their home country. It’s not just them though; it’s their architects, painters, anarchists and the petty differences of the middle classes that make up the nature of Dutch football.
National identity it seems, dictates the national style of football. Does the argument stand up when you take a look at other nations? Seeing the almost drunken fashion in which the FAI have gone about stumbling from one failed conquest to another in the ‘race’ for Ireland manager, our administrators certainly resemble some of our fine nation on a Saturday night out. But actual footballing style?
The grinding nature of the Charlton era matched some very hard financial times; much like the flair players of the ultimately unsuccessful ‘70s side resembled the ramshackle trad music bands that delighted home crowds but often struggled abroad when it came to making the big breakthrough. Now we’re a nation who relies on foreign workers to prop up the workforce; should a decent continental coach get the job he will sit well with our mercenary friendly attitudes.
England’s style of play? Is there one? If there is, it resembles their white van man fan-base (try saying that ten times in a row) rather than the country as a whole - not subtle and can be accused of being brainless at times. Perhaps instead of protesting Provos, Fabio, Capello could look to Have I Got News for You for how to handle genuine talent in a large, often misguided organisation. Joe Cole as England’s Paul Merton? Privately educated Lamps as Ian Hislop? Owen Hargreaves as the anchor? It could work. It won’t, but it could.
Then there’s Spain; where Civil War pretty much defines their current squad and any in living memory. There’s also the slow method of carrying out their day (how many meals and breaks do they have anyway) that matches the patient build up of their football sides.
There’s gotta be some decent masters degree in the whole subject – after all if they can give college lectures on the science of superheroes then national football identities should have some of Mensa’s finest working on this topic.
Winner’s tale of the Dutch is a great read anyway… though I still wish that Kieft’s header had bounced harmlessly wide.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anyhoo, had to write on something other than the Premier League above as we have been battered over the head with it over Christmas. But much like Sam Allardyce’s wife (ref: Okeydoke Football’s entirely non-libelous Awards Show) we’re back for more so give us your best shot!
Tonight we’re podcasting and discussing the events of the Christmas period (winners: Chelsea, Arsenal; losers: Liverpool, Derby, and Newcastle). We’ll also have Pub Talk and comments.
Until then, belated Happy New Year, JJ
But it’s not the injustice of the linesman's decision – after all Alan McLoughlin was standing three yards offside when Kevin Sheedy blasted home against England at Italia ’90 – instead it’s just the sickening amount of time it takes to go in. Ireland slowly but surely seeing a semi final berth slip out of their grasp.
The flight of the ball barely makes sense, some odd divot is hit and football history follows. How many times have you seen Marco Van Basten’s volley in the final? At least a hundred if you’ve even a passing interest in football, near a thousand if you happen to actually like the game. No divot, no volley, no Marco Goalo volley of the century.
Kieft’s goal disgusts me to this day. I can’t help it.
The path of Dutch football rarely makes sense, be it to do with divots, lunch time seating arrangements or even the sheer oddity that is Dirk Kuyt. Therefore, Ireland’s exit at Euro ’88 to that goal should just be chalked down as another oddball moment in the history of a nation that’s usually too busy rowing to win tournaments; despite the fact that they’re often technically the best side on show.
There was a book released a few years ago by football writer David Winner, entitled Brilliant Orange: The Neurotic Genius of Dutch Football, which I picked up again recently. When I say ‘recently’, I mean out of a desperate attempt to do anything with Christmas other than drink, eat, eat, eat, drink… oh, and avoid generally awful Christmas TV (I include nearly every live Premier League game over the festive period in that too – cheers Sky for not showing Chelsea v Villa).
It did the trick. When you see a chapter on how the ‘Provos’ changed football you generally associate it with terrace violence in Northern Ireland’s top flight in the late seventies. However, in Winner’s book he’s referring to a 1960s group of Dutch anti-establishment protestors. Their tactics for social reform basically revolved around annoying the police with clever non-violent protests and pranks to such a point that the only logical conclusion was that they would end up getting a good kicking. Public support and press headlines followed.
The book itself is about the “idea of Dutch football” rather than the Dutch national side or even their club teams. The spirit of total football, so goes the argument, comes in part from inspiration such as the Provos, who managed to free themselves from the post-war conservatism of their home country. It’s not just them though; it’s their architects, painters, anarchists and the petty differences of the middle classes that make up the nature of Dutch football.
National identity it seems, dictates the national style of football. Does the argument stand up when you take a look at other nations? Seeing the almost drunken fashion in which the FAI have gone about stumbling from one failed conquest to another in the ‘race’ for Ireland manager, our administrators certainly resemble some of our fine nation on a Saturday night out. But actual footballing style?
The grinding nature of the Charlton era matched some very hard financial times; much like the flair players of the ultimately unsuccessful ‘70s side resembled the ramshackle trad music bands that delighted home crowds but often struggled abroad when it came to making the big breakthrough. Now we’re a nation who relies on foreign workers to prop up the workforce; should a decent continental coach get the job he will sit well with our mercenary friendly attitudes.
England’s style of play? Is there one? If there is, it resembles their white van man fan-base (try saying that ten times in a row) rather than the country as a whole - not subtle and can be accused of being brainless at times. Perhaps instead of protesting Provos, Fabio, Capello could look to Have I Got News for You for how to handle genuine talent in a large, often misguided organisation. Joe Cole as England’s Paul Merton? Privately educated Lamps as Ian Hislop? Owen Hargreaves as the anchor? It could work. It won’t, but it could.
Then there’s Spain; where Civil War pretty much defines their current squad and any in living memory. There’s also the slow method of carrying out their day (how many meals and breaks do they have anyway) that matches the patient build up of their football sides.
There’s gotta be some decent masters degree in the whole subject – after all if they can give college lectures on the science of superheroes then national football identities should have some of Mensa’s finest working on this topic.
Winner’s tale of the Dutch is a great read anyway… though I still wish that Kieft’s header had bounced harmlessly wide.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anyhoo, had to write on something other than the Premier League above as we have been battered over the head with it over Christmas. But much like Sam Allardyce’s wife (ref: Okeydoke Football’s entirely non-libelous Awards Show) we’re back for more so give us your best shot!
Tonight we’re podcasting and discussing the events of the Christmas period (winners: Chelsea, Arsenal; losers: Liverpool, Derby, and Newcastle). We’ll also have Pub Talk and comments.
Until then, belated Happy New Year, JJ
Okey Doke Football Podcast is available every Friday morning, subscribe here: http://feeds.feedburner.com/OkeyDokeFootball
Like this blog? Help spread the word:
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Why Garth, why? And other questions...
Tuesday, 20 November 07, 05:16 PM
With the end of the Euro 2008 qualifiers in sight, many people are finishing up with some very important questions on their mind. While the problems of Ireland and Wales are well worn topics, so I
won’t go into them here (most of them rhyme with ‘banager’ though) there’s a few issues that are left outstanding now that – for the most part – the participants in world football’s second biggest
showcase have been decided.
Here’s a rundown…
Should they stay or should they go?
While it’s fairly obvious that many of the men who have led sides to unsuccessful campaigns will lose their jobs, there’s a few that have fate in their own hands. Marco van Basten for one has led Holland to the championships after a rough start to the campaign.
However, with Chelsea supposedly sniffing around and with his old team-mates Carlo Ancelloti and Frank Rijkaard looking shaky in their current jobs, he could yet jump ship prior to next June. There is also the suspicion that the Dutch will be far less than the sum of their parts next year, as was the case in the last World Cup. The fact that many of the players would happily see their national coach head off may also point towards an early exit for Marco Goalo.
Slaven Bilic too has said that he would like to manage in England and the poker-faced Croatian could well make a move to a decent Premier League side in the coming months. With Alan Curbishley continuing to provide plenty of bills but little answers for West Ham could the former Hammer, Bilic end up at Upton Park? Personally I hope so; the guy always talks with intelligence and likes to play good football, just what the league needs. The new Luca Vialli perhaps.
Check their heads
Scotland. Ah, poor old Scotland. Nearly there, not quite, within a whisper… say it whichever way you want but they didn’t make it. While their achievements in their group no doubt deserved more (any country would struggle to qualify from their group ahead of Italy and France); football is cruel and Scotland won’t have a competitive game for the guts of a year. Will their players be able to get themselves up for another mammoth campaign? A lot, obviously, depends on the draw for the World Cup qualifiers but consider these two questions:
(a) Their start striker McFadden has been playing well above himself, can he continue to do this at a high level? And…
(b) Can they overcome their inability to beat middling Eastern European sides away from home? The victory away to France was amazing, but victories against the Ukraine and Georgia would, most likely, have seen them through. Games like this will almost certainly feature in the next qualifying series.
All in all, these aren’t massive challenges, but the assumption they will qualify for the next major tournament is something that might come back and bite them on the arse next time around.
Major tournament England
Will the lessons be learned from the World Cup? Will the hype die down? Will the players play down their chances? Will McClaren be brave enough to drop Beckham for a second time? Will be brave enough to separate Gerrard and Lampard in a major tournament game? I’m guessing… no, no, no, no and just for a change eh… no.
There will be a lot of water under the bridge and no doubt plenty of broken metatarsals in the headlines before England head out to the tournament but you suspect that come next June it’ll be the same damn story. They have some decent players and let’s hope that now it looks like they’ll get there they play some decent football as, though I hate myself for it, I always end up watching their games.
Coverage c**ts
Will the BBC and ITV provide decent, un-biased and interesting coverage? With not a hint of Jonathan Pearce and Clive Tyldesley to be found anywhere? Will they bollocks.
“And now over to pitchside where everyone is shifting nervously next to our man on the inside, Garth Crooks.”
“Slurp…thanks Gary.”
Some things never change: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cugYQ35vtvQ
Later, JJ
Okey Doke Football Podcast is available every Friday morning, subscribe here
http://feeds.feedburner.com/OkeyDokeFootball
Here’s a rundown…
Should they stay or should they go?
While it’s fairly obvious that many of the men who have led sides to unsuccessful campaigns will lose their jobs, there’s a few that have fate in their own hands. Marco van Basten for one has led Holland to the championships after a rough start to the campaign.
However, with Chelsea supposedly sniffing around and with his old team-mates Carlo Ancelloti and Frank Rijkaard looking shaky in their current jobs, he could yet jump ship prior to next June. There is also the suspicion that the Dutch will be far less than the sum of their parts next year, as was the case in the last World Cup. The fact that many of the players would happily see their national coach head off may also point towards an early exit for Marco Goalo.
Slaven Bilic too has said that he would like to manage in England and the poker-faced Croatian could well make a move to a decent Premier League side in the coming months. With Alan Curbishley continuing to provide plenty of bills but little answers for West Ham could the former Hammer, Bilic end up at Upton Park? Personally I hope so; the guy always talks with intelligence and likes to play good football, just what the league needs. The new Luca Vialli perhaps.
Check their heads
Scotland. Ah, poor old Scotland. Nearly there, not quite, within a whisper… say it whichever way you want but they didn’t make it. While their achievements in their group no doubt deserved more (any country would struggle to qualify from their group ahead of Italy and France); football is cruel and Scotland won’t have a competitive game for the guts of a year. Will their players be able to get themselves up for another mammoth campaign? A lot, obviously, depends on the draw for the World Cup qualifiers but consider these two questions:
(a) Their start striker McFadden has been playing well above himself, can he continue to do this at a high level? And…
(b) Can they overcome their inability to beat middling Eastern European sides away from home? The victory away to France was amazing, but victories against the Ukraine and Georgia would, most likely, have seen them through. Games like this will almost certainly feature in the next qualifying series.
All in all, these aren’t massive challenges, but the assumption they will qualify for the next major tournament is something that might come back and bite them on the arse next time around.
Major tournament England
Will the lessons be learned from the World Cup? Will the hype die down? Will the players play down their chances? Will McClaren be brave enough to drop Beckham for a second time? Will be brave enough to separate Gerrard and Lampard in a major tournament game? I’m guessing… no, no, no, no and just for a change eh… no.
There will be a lot of water under the bridge and no doubt plenty of broken metatarsals in the headlines before England head out to the tournament but you suspect that come next June it’ll be the same damn story. They have some decent players and let’s hope that now it looks like they’ll get there they play some decent football as, though I hate myself for it, I always end up watching their games.
Coverage c**ts
Will the BBC and ITV provide decent, un-biased and interesting coverage? With not a hint of Jonathan Pearce and Clive Tyldesley to be found anywhere? Will they bollocks.
“And now over to pitchside where everyone is shifting nervously next to our man on the inside, Garth Crooks.”
“Slurp…thanks Gary.”
Some things never change: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cugYQ35vtvQ
Later, JJ
Okey Doke Football Podcast is available every Friday morning, subscribe here
http://feeds.feedburner.com/OkeyDokeFootball
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