When the 2010 World Cup rolls around, only 32 of the 205 teams that tried to qualify will be present. Over the last month and a half, I have selected the 32 teams I believe will make the 2010 World Cup. I will now order the teams 1-32 in the order of my certainty that they will qualify.

Now, a (1) on this list means I am not sure they will make it, but a (32) means I think they definitely will (that is why S. Africa is #32). Without further ado, here is the list of the 32 teams I believe will be present in S. Africa in June and July 2010.

1. New Zealand
2. Turkey
3. Chile
4. Republic of Ireland
5. Iran
6. Croatia
7. Cameroon
8. Russia
9. Costa Rica
10. Egypt
11. Korea Republic
12. Greece
13. Uruguay
14. Portugal
15. France
16. Czech Republic
17. Ghana
18. Paraguay
19. Nigeria
20. Mexico
21. Ivory Coast
22. USA
23. Italy
24. Germany
25. Japan
26. Holland
27. England
28. Spain
29. Argentina
30. Australia
31. Brazil
32. South Africa

When the 2010 World Cup rolls around, only one or zero of the ten teams from the Oceania region will be present. Now, this region is the smallest (actually tied with S. America, but not nearly as good at soccer), so it makes sense that only a single team gets a chance to qualify. I think that one team will take advantage by making it to S. Africa.

Well, here that team is:

1. New Zealand: OK, so they easily bested the crappy teams in their division to make it to the playoff game to get into the 2010 World Cup in South Africa. In fact, they absolutely dominated the other Oceania teams. Who are these teams though? Fiji, Vanuatu (huh?) and New Caledonia (who are apparently better than Old Caledonia). So, to make a long story short, they haven’t played anyone yet, and they will have to beat probably Korea DPR or Iran to make the tourney. But, for some strange reason I think they will do it. It would be a darn shame if one team from this region didn’t make the tourney, so I am backing New Zealand. Sure, they are the least likely to qualify of all the teams I have cited, but I can’t help but support their long-shot dreams.

When the 2010 World Cup rolls around, only four or five of the 43 “Asian” teams will be present. Of course, a few of these teams aren’t “Asian” at all, but who ever said FIFA knew a darn thing about geography. Spoiler alert: I like the Asian region, but I think they only get 4 teams in. Now the question is which four will appear in 2010 in South Africa.

Well, here they are in order of how certain I am they will qualify:

1. Australia: This squad hasn’t given up a goal during the final round of qualifying despite playing all four teams in their group. I think they will definitely make it to the tournament. With their skill, how could they not?
2. Japan: Though they were drawn into the same group as AUS, I still like their chances of qualifying the second best in the region. Why? Well, they have a ton of talent and I think they will easily make it to the 2010 WC.
3. Korea Republic: This is where it gets harder in this region. Though they have been good so far, Korea DPR and IRN could ultimately prevent them from reaching the world’s biggest tournament. I still think they qualify.
4. Iran: Ditto above about Korea DPR maybe bouncing them from the tourney. But, I think Iran bests Korea DPR in their next game to qualify for the last Asian spot, and Korea DPR loses to New Zealand. Just my opinion.

When the 2010 World Cup rolls around, only five of the 53 teams from the African region will be present (well, 6 of 54 if you count the hosts, South Africa). The CAF has been the region that features some of the fastest rising international squads in the world, but which of these talented teams will play before friendly crowds in 2010?

Well, here they are in order of how certain I am they will qualify:

1. Cote d’Ivoire: Their draw is absolutely laughable. If they don’t make the tourney, I will be shocked. The teams they play are lucky to have even made it to the 3rd round, and they are a bona fide African side.
2. Nigeria: They may be the best of the region’s bunch and their draw is also ridiculously easy. They should have no problem advancing to the tourney, and when they do I think they will be an underdog team to watch.
3. Ghana: What an easy draw (are you sensing a pattern here). They should easily advance to the world’s biggest tourney and I wouldn’t put an escape from the group stage past them. They will have the crowd on their side.
4. Egypt: Even though they have had some recent fantastic performances, this team still doesn’t get much respect. While I don’t think they will be a force during the World Cup, I imagine they will at least qualify.
5. Cameroon: Crazy that I have them all the way down here, I know. They have some fantastic players and great chemistry. But, Morocco is no slouch, and if they can upset Cameroon, Africa’s best may fail to qualify.

Briefing: Agent Michael Owen (aka “the Jaded Jaguar”) has one of the longest histories of any MNT member, yet he lately has been omitted from important events. In nearly 90 appearances with the MNT, he has scored a whopping 40 goals, but his increasing age and proneness to injury have slowed his ascent. Still, I think he will be around in 2010.

Special Skills: Agent Owen became a legend at Liverpool, where he won the Player of the Year Award and many other trophies. Unfortunately, injuries derailed his once promising career, and though he still performs quite well, many experts fear he will never again be the player he once was. He still has a lot left in the tank though, in my opinion.

International Actions: Agent Owen has been a part of Mission 1998, Mission 2002 and Mission 2006. Though he delighted fans and frustrated defenses during all three Cups, he was injured during Mission 2006 and he has not returned to top form since. Now, Director Capello seems to be overlooking Agent Owen as Mission 2010 approaches.

Mission: Agent Owen’s mission, should he decide to accept it, will be to battle his way back into the MNT starting lineup. To do so, he must prove that he still has the attacking instinct and nose for the net that once made him a stalwart for the MNT. The agency will need goals to eliminate their enemies, and few in the nation’s history have scored as many as Agent Owen. This message will self-destruct in five seconds.

When the 2010 World Cup rolls around, only three or four of a whopping 35 teams will be present (in my opinion CONCACAF gets screwed by FIFA). As I mentioned in my S. America post last week, I think their fifth team beats CONCACAF’s fourth, so only three teams from this region will make it to the 2010 World Cup. But, which ones?

Well, here they are in order of how certain I am they will qualify:

1. USA: Hey, you can call me biased because I am a yankee, but I still think USA has now established itself as the cream of the CONCACAF crop. While MEX struggles, Bob Bradley has this team clicking and hopefully he will be able to carry this wave of good play through qualifying and into the 2010 tournament in South Africa.
2. Mexico: Yes, they have been bad lately. Yes, injuries and old age have ravaged their team. But, Mexico is still one of the most dominant teams in CONCACAF and will be present in 2010. Their defense is simply too good to lose to the region’s lesser teams. They are no sure thing, but I also think they will buck up and make it to 2010.
3. Costa Rica: This is where it gets hard. Costa Rica is a team on the rise though, unlike T&T, El Salvador, and Honduras. In the end, I think they will get in, but just barely. While I assume they will get stomped in the tournament, I think it will be truly great for the people of Costa Rica just to make the world’s biggest tourney.

Briefing: Agent Theo Walcott (aka “Slade’s Blade”) is a rising star for the MNT and one must imagine he will play a large role in Mission 2010. Despite being young in age (20), Agent Walcott has already established himself as an exciting winger and perhaps the future of the MNT. If he can stay healthy, he could be just what the MNT needs.

Special Skills: Agent Walcott is reputed to be one of the fastest players in the world. After dominating lower level competition, he became a Gunner, and expectations were so high he was awarded Henry’s #14 jersey. But, injuries have hampered his development and slowed his ascension into the MNT’s hierarchy. He is still a dangerous threat though.

International Actions: Agent Walcott, believe it or not, was selected for the MNT’s Mission 2006 despite the fact he was only 17 years old at the time. Though he was chosen over more established agents, the Director (a Swedish double agent) refused to play him. In his first full international game, he had a hat trick against Croatia, a great start.

Mission: Agent Walcott’s mission, should he decide to accept it, will be to dazzle audiences and defenders with his amazing attacking abilities during Mission 2010. He needs to score goals and frustrate the MNT’s enemies. He also needs to stay healthy, as his young frame has been riddled with injuries. This message will self-destruct in five seconds.

Briefing: Agent Joe Cole (aka “The Paddington Prodigy”) is a well-established member of the MNT and has had a tremendous professional carrer. Though oft-criticized for his injury prone physique, Agent Cole is still a deadly option at winger for the MNT. Should he regain his best form, he could play an important role during Mission 2010.

Special Skills: Agent Cole has had a very successful career in the EPL with both West Ham and Chelsea. During his reign at the latter, he has won two Prem titles. He is a fantastic player, but he is also often injured, which has hurt his legacy both professionally and internationally. When healthy though, he is a dangerous threat to score at any time. 

International Actions: Agent Cole has appeared in over 50 missions and notched 10 goals. He was present during Mission 2002, but only appeared in limited fashion. During Mission 2006, he played quite well and notched a goal and an assist in an early game. He has been involved in the preparations for Mission 2010, but he hasn’t been healthy.

Mission: Agent Cole’s mission, should he decide to accept it, will be to provide the MNT with a strong option on the wing. When healthy, he is one of the best players in the world, but he hasn’t been healthy much lately. For the MNT to succeed though, Agent J. Cole must contribute some offensive firepower. This message will self-destruct in five seconds.

Briefing: Agent David Beckham (aka “Sir Goldenballs of Manchester”) is past his prime, but in the past he was one of the most dangerous assassins in the world, from a set piece anyways. He is reputed to have one of the most accurate crosses in the world, but the real question is whether Director Capello thinks he belongs on the pitch in 2010.

Special Skills: Agent Beckham will always be best remembered for his glory days with Man U. He never achieved the same level of skill in Spain with Real Madrid, and the last two years in MLS have been a joke with no acceptable punch line. Now he is in Milan, but many think he should not be in South Africa in 2010. We shall see.

International Actions: Agent Beckham first took the pitch for the MNT in 1996, meaning he will be the senior member of the squad if he is selected for Mission 2010. He is close to actually breaking the all-time appearances record for the MNT, and he has actually served the squad quite well, though he has failed to bring them many honors.

Mission: Agent Beckham’s mission, should he decide to accept it, is to prove the naysayers wrong by qualifying for and playing in his record fourth World Cup Finals tournament for the MNT. In order to acheive this goal, he will have to prove to Director Capello that his skills have not deteriorated over time. This message will self-destruct in five seconds.

Briefing: Agent Wayne Rooney (aka “the Nutcracker”) is one of the most prolific scorers in MNT history. Depsite his young age (23) he has amassed an amazing professional career. His greatest two skills are scoring goals and earning red cards, so he simultaneously delights and abhors dedicated fan’s of the MNT. He will need to bring his best in 2010.

Special Skills: Agent Rooney is not exactly big or fast, but he is effective because he is strong and he has an innate nose for the net. He was one of the youngest EPL players ever, and with Man U he has won two Prem titles and a Champions League trophy. He scores at will it seems, and many defenders have been left agape at his skills. 

International Actions: Agent Rooney was the youngest ever MNT member when he first took the pitch (though Agent Walcott has since broked the record). He was selected to play in Mission 2006, but he was not fit and spent his time in an oxygen tent. When he did play against Portugal, he was red carded for stepping on an opponent’s nuts.

Mission: Agent Rooney’s mission, should he decide to accept it, is to score several goals for the MNT during Mission 2010 while refraining from drawing red cards for stomping on enemies’ appendages. It sounds like an easy task, but Agent Rooney has thus far failed to control his violent, detrimental behavior. This message will self-destruct in five seconds.