OK, so we love breasts, big tackles and boozy players – but as well as all your favourite footballing frivolity, I think that blogs like us, our oleole.com chums and everyone out in the wider blogosphere have a responsibility. A responsibility to do whatever we can to bring sporting injustice to the wider audience, and get fan power back on the agenda! For too long the FA has been dicking over 'smaller clubs' – and my pal has recently let me know about this Facebook group representing Luton Town... Perhaps the most unjustly treated team of the last year.

Everyone knows the story (if you don’t, click here) but as a result of the FA's treatment of the Happy Hatters (the deduction of 10 points for "transfer irregularities" that were nothing more than technicalities - payment...

They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder - well so is talent, and deep in the cavernous dark pupils of mine, Darren Farley appears (video below), heralded as a bloody genius! Matching stride for stride the leg work that any of these boys give on the pitch week in, week out - take a look at this video to see the formidable scouse lad doing impressions of all sorts of stars who grace (and have graced) Anfield over the last few years.

Personally, I think his pastiche of Jamie Carragher is absolutely the best, although he has Michael Owen's massively bland monotone down to an absolute tea! 

If DSOTB had enough money for a Christmas Party, fuck it - we'd book this lad! And I imagine you'd all be there.

Courtesy of our pal Jeffo (I would link but he's too lazy to blog), and one which should entertain the handsome Harry Hotspur I have no doubt ;-) Congratulations Spurs!

Introducing Peter Swan, a hard as nails goalkeeper and true legend who may have encapsulated the spirit of the Dark Side more fully than any player that would trip off the tongue of your average footy 'fan'. In just one incident, Swan puts to shame all the wannabes (are you reading this Craig Bellamy?) and elevates himself to true DS status.

Playing for Port Vale - idolised by Robbie Williams (not ideal, but we all have our crosses to bear) - old Peter was rooming with a chap not playing in the following day's Autoglass final at Wembley. So what, you might say. Well not content with a hearty meal and getting his head down for a night of worried sleep, old Swanny decided to go on the lash. Until 6am. Genius. So much so that he was 'still drunk' on the bus on the way to the park, can't remember much about the...

OK, Best was phenomenal on the pitch.

I would hazard a guess that in most British peoples' opinion he was better than Maradona at football. But who's the naughtiest?

There's some great quotes by George Best:"I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered" and "I used to go missing a lot - Miss Canada, Miss UK, Miss World."

But drinking your way to an early grave is a bit soft, when compared to filling your entire head with class A drugs. And let's not forget, Diego Maradona is from South America, so the snow he ploughs up his conk is 'A star' shit.

I can't decide whether Diego's denial of Diego Jnr (how can he...

In the fucked up world of fancy dan football and the bollocks that goes with, we have to put up with the scabrous leeches that are the press. For the great part they're idiots and we have to listen to their negativity and self important cock foolery! The only exception to this was when Graham Taylor was called out for being a turnip... now that is worthy fucking investigative sports journalism.

Anyway I digress. So the press suck and a former Wimbledon manager most people thought was dead shows up and is given the Newcastle job... Oh, how we chortled! Then he held a press conference and we fucking pissed ourselves laughing as he went to war with a few journos who should actually burn at the stake. 

The argument is fueled by the report Joe held training, and Mickey Owen and his worse than Spurs counter-parts didn't turn up or, were given the day off by mad Joe Kinnear. The truth is, no-one knows for...

I represent a consortium of wealthy Nigerians with $800 million dollars we need to park in your bank account due to unreasonable repression in our country. Please send us your details and we will happily deposit the cash there. Oh and can we have your football club as well, please?'

So desperate is the chubby pint-downing squillionaire that he may actually have fallen for it, cos it according to numerous sources including Goal.com that there is an offer on the table from a consortium headed by one Chris Nathaniel. Following Ashley's failed bid to flog the club in the Middle East a couple of weeks ago (by all accounts he just flew there and at the time the takeover was meant to be signed he was drinking in a bar, in a Muslim country, it could well be that he'll...

Football and booze have long been synonymous with each other, with a number of the nation’s most exciting pig-bladder hoofers destroyed by the demon drink.

Gazza, Bestie, Gary Charles - and who can forget the cult figures like Robin Friday and ‘Vodka’ Vic Kachloul who have simply destroyed their careers through their love of alcohol... Jesus, even I’m close to admitting my football career is a non-started after spending the last 6 years propping up bars across the country (sorry Fabio – go on without me!)

But it ...

Well just as we thought the Respect campaigns had spilled off the field and our footy boys weren't going to get up to anything naughty this season, a rash of bad behaviour has struck. Firstly Carlton Cole - was he drunk? If he wasn't what the hell was he doing driving round at that time in the morning? Finely tuned athletes my arse. Hope Zola gave him a proper bollocking.

Now it seems that Everton's Steven Pienaar is on bail following an alleged assault on a Liverpool woman in a flat in the city over the weekend. Here's what I think will happen. This Sunday, big story in the News Of The World, player disappears for a week to the reserves, slapper gets tabloid cash, charges quietly dropped. It happened to Ronaldo, it happened to Jonny Evans, heck, it even happened to David Sullivan (Birmingham co-owner) this week.

Once again, slappers one, footballer nil. Nice work love.*

We've covered bizarre injuries from the past before on these pages, and it seems that Stoke's Liam Lawrence saw the article, wondered why he wasn't on the list, and went and fell over his dog on purpose.

Well, Liam, you'll be pleased to know you've made it, you massive, massive idiot. 

Stepping over your dog on the stairs is not a good idea in anyone's books, but you're meant to be a finely tuned athlete. Surely a flying leap with pike and 2 1/2 somersaults to arrive neatly at the bottom of the stairs would have been less risky.

He joins the list of luminaries to suffer at the paws of others, such as Darren Barnard and Chic Brodie. Exactly.

How we imagine Lawrence - mid fall