OK, Best was phenomenal on the pitch.

I would hazard a guess that in most British peoples' opinion he was better than Maradona at football. But who's the naughtiest?

There's some great quotes by George Best:"I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered" and "I used to go missing a lot - Miss Canada, Miss UK, Miss World."

But drinking your way to an early grave is a bit soft, when compared to filling your entire head with class A drugs. And let's not forget, Diego Maradona is from South America, so the snow he ploughs up his conk is 'A star' shit.

I can't decide whether Diego's denial of Diego Jnr (how can he...

Football and booze have long been synonymous with each other, with a number of the nation’s most exciting pig-bladder hoofers destroyed by the demon drink.

Gazza, Bestie, Gary Charles - and who can forget the cult figures like Robin Friday and ‘Vodka’ Vic Kachloul who have simply destroyed their careers through their love of alcohol... Jesus, even I’m close to admitting my football career is a non-started after spending the last 6 years propping up bars across the country (sorry Fabio – go on without me!)

But it ...

Well it's been a while since...oh hang on, no it's not. Oh well, with nothing going on in the world of footy, except Man City (the richest club in the world) being dumped out of the Carling Cup by the mighty Brighton on pens last night, just thought it would be a good time to catch up with our WAGs.

First up is Abbey Clancey who is set to become the face body of Matalan's value for money bras and pants. It's like she's taken one look at Danielle Bux and signed the first contract that was waved under her nose. Those knickers. Just look...

Nice body though. And thanks to the dudes at

....for burglary. I know what you were thinking though.

Kim Lewis/Mohamed/whatever, 48, mother to the 28 year old *hottie* that is Danielle was arrested and released on bail with a male pal for allegedly burgling the home of her ex-husband, the future Mrs. Lineker's Dad. Confused? Who cares? You get to see a pic of a babe in her knickers in a minute, so read on.

It just seems hilarious to us here at DSOTB that El Jugeario (as he was known when he played for Barcelona), or Rinika-sahn (which is what they called him at Grampas 8), or plain old Wing Nut (see Leicester City and Spurs ex-players for confirmation), is marrying a chick whose Mum is only one year older than him. If ever there was a sign that your bird is a bit young, it's settling down to watch Antiques Roadshow...

…according to this story in the News Of The World anyway. She charges 2 grand a night, or £460 for an hour’s quickie. So by our reckoning, we only need to scrape together 77 quid and we could have a go on her. Twice.

And judging by the pics below, it doesn’t take much to get her in her skimpies. She was trying to tempt the undercover reporter into getting it on with her and a fellow ‘professional’, and (like a massive dick fool idiot imbecile) he declined. He also turned down her very kind offer of some Grade A nose candy too. Talk about missing an opportunity*!

So the Winking One will have some hard thinking to do now that a national tabloid has exposed his belo...

Cheryl Cole appeared at London Fashion Week strutting her stuff on the catwalk last week. And managed to cause a ruckus. It seems that the boyfriend of one Cameron Diaz took a shine to the former Ms. Tweedy and is now following her round like a puppy dog, tongue out, eyes wide. Dick.

There's at least two sources (here and here) that reckon one Paul Sculfor (beau of the aforementioned Ms. Diaz) has been traipsing round like a lovesick teenager after the Geordie bint, as has another model David Gandy. But what do the fellas do if the bird they're chasing is terminally attracted to the massive, massive twat that is Ashley Cole? Well...I...

Just when you thought life was all about Carly Zucker and her massive hair, and the walking soap opera that is Cheryl Cole, I bring you two fresh pin up girls for you to, erm, study furiously.

First up is the delectable Giselle Santa Cruz, arm candy of Blackburn's Mr. Roque. Talk about the girl next door Thanks to The Offside for the heads up.

Our new friends at Asylum (well they will be if they keep bringing us stories like this), have lightened my day considerably with the fact that the Dutch FA - in their infinite wisdom stupidity - have banned an amateur ladies' team from playing in short skirts instead of shorts. Now I urge you to take one look at the picture below and tell me that bloke's shorts are sexier.

See? You can't. FC de Rakt ladies, we applaud you.

Dutch FA - you're all clowns.

It's Friday, so we all deserve a little fun, and a quick trawl of favourite site Soccer Babes reveals something that I didn't realise before. Lots of girls who watch football wear bikinis. And when it gets exciting they hug, they kiss and they grope. Awesome.

Not an excuse to post severla pics of our most famous celebrity wives, honest. This is one for the gossip-hounds amongst you.

First up is Joe Cole's bit of fluff Carly Zucker who spotted a passing bandwagon and leapt on it feet first (again), this time in an attempt to get people fit for the Sweat in the City campaign (see what they did with the name there? Hope they're proud of themselves). Anyway, the excuse to get in front of the cameras in tight-fitting bottoms was one not to be passed up by the publicity-hungry Zucker, and the results are there for all to see. Didn't manage to sort out her massive bouffon though, did they?

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