You know the scene at the end of 'The Wickerman'? Where Edward Woodward is lured up a cliff to be burned by a pagen cult who dance aboot naked? Well, I think Ian Brines fancied that was going to happen to him if he went against the longboat burning, haggis eating, virgin blood drinking Ross Tokelyites on Saturday.

He turned a blind eye to a sending off and numerous other assualts. He dished oot cards like fake money at a pikey wedding to Celtic players for minor misdemeaners. He...

LOTW has recovered. A pain, that was like a thousand paper cuts, that made me go to that dark place, the place that when the sun comes up you want to put your head back under the covers, a place that makes you want to book into that hotel in 'The Shining' and a place that is as welcome as a Nazi whore in Max Mosley's house.

Yes,  the pain of pre-season defeat and the loss of the coveted 'Algarve Cup' is hard to take.

 "Burnley!!!!! Techno, techno, techno, techno...."

"The Gallowgate is burning doon, is burning doon, The Gallowgate is burning doon....and it wiz Kenneh Misser" Naw, it wisnny, really, but he seems to...